Through Chrissie's eyes

The Goodbye

With the new house, other new things also happened, like the fact that I had my own car and didn't have to go by bus to work, I dreamed one day I didn't have to wear public transport, but I didn't expect it to really happen, sometimes that scared me, but over time, once again, I got used to it.

Another thing that changed was that my work schedule and Brian's were very different, I would leave early in the morning and this was the time we were sure we would see each other, but when I came back, not every day he was at home, he would sometimes get stuck in the studio, hitting the last details of a song, or a meeting with the band's management and EMI executives, or even getting ready for a new show.

But even with this rush, there were the quietest days, and the days we had to maintain an old tradition that I loved and would never give up, to gather at home, to talk, to watch something, to laugh and to be a family which we have always been.

And it was on one of those quiet days that I met him at home, writing a new song, sitting on the couch, with all his typical features of concentration there.

"I hope I'm not disturbing ..." I approached slowly.

"You? Never" Brian got up to kiss me "I'm just finishing a song, its's kind of ..."

"Kind of what?" I turned all my attention to him.

"Not much rock, let's say like that," he tried to explain, "by the way I wrote it, to keep the original essence of the song has to stay in that folk style, you know? I would need an acoustic guitar for this song to work."

"Oh, I understand," I nodded, "you're afraid the boys will think it's bad because it's not rock'n'roll enough?"

"That's right," my husband confessed, a little embarrassed.

"But, you know what? I'll just be able to talk properly if the boys will like it if I listen to it first" I smiled as I urged him to play.

"You know you just need to ask, don't you?" he pointed out, finding a little amused in what I did.

"I know, but it was to make you laugh," I explained, "I wanted to cheer you up a little bit."

"Thank you, my love." He recognized my efforts. "I'll be right back."

Brian went after an acoustic guitar before playing his newest and most mysterious song, besides Red Special we had a acoustic guitar and piano, everything for him to use in his compositions, depending on the style of each song he created. Soon he came back and sat down, positioned the instrument and sighed before starting to play.

-Ok ... " Brian said and finally played and sang the song.

I loved to see him onstage with Queen, but there, only him and the guitar at his moment of creation was magical. The song spoke of events in the year 39, I couldn't tell from what century, it seemed like a story, someone telling a story that he saw, with refinements of a narrative spoken for children, but as the lyrics were being discussed, I saw that it was much more than that.

The melody was soft, like Brian's voice accompanying the chords, so many chords I didn't know how he wasn't confused. That song had thrilled me in an unexpected way. I was surprised to have to hold back a tear or two.

"Oops ..." Brian noticed my cry - it wasn't quite what I wanted ..."

"Is it me who you're calling in music?" I asked, following my interpretation.

"It's a story that popped up in my head when I was watching the sky, but ..." He sat down next to me. "I think there's a bit of my yearning for you when we don't see each other."

"But I'm not going anywhere," I promised once more, as on the day of our engagement "I think I just got too excited because I'm too sensitive, the song is beautiful ... And now I can be sure the boys will like it even if you make them cry."

"Ah, coming from you is the greatest of compliments." He kissed my temple and pulled me carefully closer to him.

Everything I've said has left us so sentimental that we have to stay close to each other for a while. It was funny how the '39 vibe combined perfectly with what we would spend the next few weeks. It was all set for the Queen tour in Japan.

Of course I was happy, being an international band meant that more and more people recognized and appreciated their talent, something that I saw them fighting so hard to conquer, it was more than deserved. But my anxiety also made me long for anticipation. I tried to enjoy every moment O had with Brian until the day of his trip. I helped him packing, laughing at the contrast between the ordinary clothes and the clothes for the shows.

We woke up early to find the rest of the guys at the airport. I was restless by my husband's side, waiting for the call to their plane. But it wasn't just me who was like this, Mary and Veronica were worried about their boyfriends, but they didn't let us see as much as I did. It was then that John Reid called them to leave, I gave a big hug to Freddie, John and Roger, wishing all good luck and a good trip.

"It's time ..." Brian turned to me.

"Yeah, I know," I sighed, "you know this is not the first time we said goodbye before you went to a show, I never reacted like that, it's just ... We've never been away from each other for so long."

"I know," he touched my face, "but we'll be fine, I'll be back soon. Don't forget that, okay?"

"All right," I said, "call me when you can, okay? Every day, if you can ..."

"We only have to pay attention to the time zone," my husband reminded me, "but I'll call you. I really have to go, Chrissie. I love you."

"Have a good trip, my love" I kissed him a little deliberately on purpose "Remember that before the shows, okay?"

"Good luck kiss." He understood and smiled.

"Bye, Bri, I love you!" I waved at him as he joined the boys.

Me and the girls stayed there until we saw the plane take off, already missing those cluttered, talented, and sweethearts of our lives.