Through Chrissie's eyes

Back to rock

Over time, Louisa has been learning more words and walking. I didn't see her taking her first steps, I only knew this because she made a point of walking toward her father, when I wasn't present, Brian told me all the details of the moment. And unintentionally, no matter how much I and Jimmy talked to her, nothing excited her vocabulary more than seeing Brian sing and play at home. It was amazing she didn't cry when he sang 39. I think she was a real daddy's little girl after all, although she always looked at me for approval before doing anything.

So while Brian was working on a new song for the next Queen album, Louisa was sitting next to him, paying attention to everything he did. He stopped for a moment and stood up suddenly.

"Where you go Daddy?" she asked, more afraid than worried.

"I'll be right back, my love, I promise." Brian kissed Louisa's forehead, and it wasn't long before he returned, bringing in the largest amplifier we had at home.

"Wow! Let's have a private show?" I looked at the box, finding it a little exaggerated, but I knew he would be careful not to turn up the volume on the maximum.

Brian could be a rock star, but he wasn't a fan of loud, heavy sound.

"It's that I got excited, we finally got back to good old rock'n roll and I'm going to enjoy it to the fullest" he explained, smiling.

Brian re-arranged the Red Special, plugging it into the amplifier. He played a chord, testing the sound, the vibration reverberating through our ears. Bri then touched the solo he was working on, super heavy and loaded, true to rock roots, yet still had an interesting melody.

"Pretty!" Louisa praised, clapping her hands.

"Thank you, my sweetheart." Brian bowed his head toward her, "but I'm not done yet."

"Do you have any lyrics or rhythm? Or both?" The solo had left me curious about the rest of the song.

"Oh, a little of both, I must finish it" my husband explained to me as he gestured, handing me his notebook.

"Hammer to Fall" I read the title aloud and the rest mentally.

He had words scrawled and replaced by others here and there.

"It's about the Cold War, isn't it?" I noticed the subject immediately.

"Yes, brilliant as always, my love." He kissed my cheek as I deduced correctly, and I blushed.

No matter how much time passed, his compliments always flattered me. Brian kept working on the rhythm of the song, putting the chords over the words. When he realized it was ready, he tried singing the whole song for the first time.

Jimmy, recognizing his father's voice and guitar, came to listen to him with me and his sister. I connected to the song immediately, I simply loved it. Me and my kids clapped as Brian finished.

"Thank you, family, thank you." Bri thanked, moved by our support.

If Brian had composed, it meant that his bandmates had also returned to work. During the rehearsals in the studio, I was able to appreciate the new creations of John, Freddie and Roger.

Roger had finished the song that Felix had inspired him to write. According to his father, the little boy had ventured to speak a little French, his mother's first language, speaking "radio caca". The phrase, however simple, inspired Roger to write a song about the nostalgia of radio in the midst of modernity. It was a simple concept, but I being the nostalgic one that I was, I ended up enjoying the music. In addition, the chorus that was slightly modified for reasons of cacophony in certain languages, was stuck to the head. After the boys finished recording "Radio Gaga", I ended up humming randomly, several times.

"You really liked that one, huh!" commented Brian about my behavior.

"Yes, I did, but don't worry, I still love your songs" I assured him.

"Just the songs?" He gave me a smirk, playing with me.

"Before I loved the songs, I love you and it was you who made them, so loving the songs, is the same as loving you" I smile at him, satisfied with my response.

"Couldn't you give a simple answer?" Brian continued to tease me, raising his eyebrows.

"I love you" I surrendered, feeling my heart pound as I saw his smile.

I loved my husband, but I loved the band and their songs too. Freddie and John also continued to work, Deaky composed a just one song, as he used to. "I Want to Break Free" was able to balance rock and disco, Brian even adapted a guitar solo without getting so strident, which matched more with the song. As for the lyrics, it seemed like someone was reluctant to a kind of love that only hurt. It wasn't something John was going through, but maybe he had already passed it on in life, or knew someone in that situation.

Freddie described the conflicts of being in love with "It's a Hard Life," this time I was sure that the feelings he put into the song was something he had already felt, and perhaps still felt in the present.

Work on the new album was interrupted by the arrival of little Laura Deacon, who was born late one night. I remember being startled to hear the phone ring after 10:30 pm at night, but I was more awake than Brian and answered. I was happy to see John telling me the news, very happy.

I remembered that my little ones were asleep, and it wouldn't be fair to call Gracey at that hour. Then I told Brian that Laura was born, he laughed with happiness for our friends, hurried to get ready, said goodbye to me, and went alone to the hospital. The first of the boys to get there was Brian, as I learned later. Just he and John stayed most of the time together, which mended the last little breakups that their friendship still had.

Then a day later, I, Lou, Jimmy and Bri went to the Deacon's house so me and the little ones would meet Laura. She was as beautiful as her mother, with the delicate features that reminded me of Veronica, but she had her eyes and hair like John's.

"Congratulations, Veronica" I complimented my friend with her daughter on my lap "and John, of course! One more girl, it seems that our wish was granted."

"Yeah, a little girl, maybe she'll help make the boys calmer" Deaky mused.

"Well, it's the other way around at home" Brian said. "Louisa is a lot more agitated than Jimmy, and whether you like it or not, the two of them are very quiet together."

"You're lucky to have children who don't make mischief" Veronica was half ironic "but I love my boys, just the way they are."

This time, our children were well in our sight. Robert had spread pieces of lego across the living room rug, Jimmy and Mike were building a tower together, Louisa and Robert were building something else that was hard to identify. Seeing the children like that made me very happy, and it was wonderful to see the Deacons and the Mays in harmony.