Advice For The Christian Girl

Some Lessons And Advice

•·.·''·.·•Some Lessons And Advice•·.·''·.·•

1) Learn early on not to care about what others think about you

This is a hard one for too many and I get it. It's not meant to be easy that's why it's a lesson you should learn early on. When you're young, you care about what others think, when you're in your mid-years you stop caring and when you're old you realise no one cared that much about you. It's crazy how we feel like we are the stars of our movie and everyone is watching our every move.

Realise right now that 90% of people don't care about you. not in a mean way but most people don't spend 20 minutes and more thinking about their mistakes and issues because they have their own.

You'll rarely find someone who cares about your life. That person is either your next close friend or an enemy who is either jealous or just hates you. Most human beings don't care so if someone does they either love you or don't like you.

Just think about it, do you remember other peoples lives, think of all their stuttering mistakes? you probably thought of them for like 10 secs then moved on to the speech you have to tell. that's a class oral example, people will notice your mistakes if you allow them to but will forget all about it after 2 minutes and worry about their own. They won't even remember your name.

Build a habit of not worrying what people think, start focusing on your own life and relationship with God. If someone doesn't like something about you, remember they won't even remember your name in 2 years and refer to you as "some girl I met on the train"

Trust me, the older you get, the more you'll realise caring about what others think is a waste of precious time you could have just done what you love

2) Avoid taking everything personally

A lot of the things that happen in life isn't personal. If someone misses your wedding, for example, it could have been because they have been going through something that distracted them from your big day. They aren't trying to make you feel bad or show they don't care. If your parents don't tell you to go someone or allow you for example to go to a sleepover it isn't because they don't trust you ( sometimes it I but most times no) it most likely means they don't trust this world and would rather let you be safe with them then to be the next kid on the news. When someone yells at you or lashes out, it isn't always because they hate you or are annoyed at you, most times when I get mad I end up ignoring the person not because I'm mad at them but to cool myself down before I can now calmly communicate how I feel.

Avoiding taking everything personally will help a lot. Some people aren't mean girls but just insecure and jealous people who use you as a scapegoat. some people aren't there to make you miserable, some are just dealing with hard things like parents separating or the death of a loved one. If someone doesn't open up to you it could just mean they have been hurt so badly in their life that trusting people is just very hard, it doesn't mean you are a bad friend and they don't love you. They probably do love you but just need to work on themselves alone first

Most things about YOU but everything about them. They have jealousy issues, vulnerability issues, broken people, insecure people, they all have issues.

3) The emotional expression

Now, what does this mean? Do you get angry and snap? Do you feel like no one understand you and slam the door? Do you feel like our life is a mess and block everyone around you. These emotional habits mean you struggle with emotional maturity. There are many emotionally immature adults in this world too many think more with feelings than thinking. When you are mad, it clouds your judgement, when you're frustrated and annoyed or just feel overwhelmed and stops you from learning. It's best to allow yourself to cool down by not saying anything at all. I have a 12-year-old sister who whenever she gets mad, she says nothing even when it isn't her fault. After about 20 minutes she returns and explains the situation calmly but listens. She knows so she did nothing wrong but still listens to what the other person has to say, when they are done she can better see the misunderstanding and move on. Emotions are like fogs, you can't see anything either than what you feeling at the moment. Learn to work on it

4) Comparison is a trap

You see someone walking by you in class, they are beautiful, unique eyes, a stylish bag and a charismatic likeable personality ad all you think is "wow this persons life must be so much easier than mine"

You make this assumption based on how they look and what they have. You assume because they are pretty that they can easily get dates, that because they have a stylish bag that they can bug and go to places you can and because they are charismatic that everyone loves them

Because of this, you're assuming that because you don't have this, that's why you are having the problems you have. If you are single, you assume because they are pretty they get dates easily/ So you think that if you were prettier it would solve your singleness problem. That if you were funnier than sarcastic it would make others love you more.

5) My personal biggest problem was living in a fantasy

Have you ever just sat down and daydream about how cool it would be for public speak without freezing up? Tell people you know to play the guitar? Being skateboard, finishing a whole novel and publishing it? Being able to say you know 5 languages?

We often spend the time wishing we had these, that we were more social, more athletic, maybe know how to bake so well, being able to tell jokes that make others joke

God had to point this out to me himself and make me sit down and realise how I have been doing this for years. I wonder how cool it would be to stand on a stage without having anxiety and talking about God in front of my school without worrying. Or being able to play the guitar like I always wanted, or learning how to make Italian dishes and speaking 3 more languages than I know

With technology today we can do this but how many of us do? we complain about how we are limited to do anything because of our parents when we are teens but how many of us earn German like we want to? or playing more than 2 instruments

Stop living in a fantasy world and make it your reality. Instead of imagining longer hair, but working to help grow it, instead of imagining yourself as more social, work on it and practice. You'll find that your imagination is soon your reality. One day you'll be older and you'll be the person you always dreamt to be. It's very possible

You have big dreams and everyone has a lot of dreams but only a handful work to achieve it

6) Pick good role models

Pick role models that inspire you and build you or help you be a better person this can be online but also one in your real life. Someone you can go to for Godly counsel and wisdom, someone you know is Spirit-led and can help you.