His Mistress, Her Nightmare (COMPLETED)

I Told You So

I couldn't even enjoy myself, for the rest of the night or the past few weeks. I kept thinking about Jasmine and what might happen between her and Marcus. I just had to tell Devin that the food made me feel weird. I hate lying to him but I damn sure can't tell him what was really up. Ugh. Midterms are here, now, and all I can think about is drama. None of my girls are having these issues but here I am. It helps that they're all in committed relationships. I'm also making matters worse by allowing Marcus to come over, finally. Devin is at work and everyone else is still studying. I don't know why I'm doing this to myself.

A knock on my door, ends my thoughts. I open the door and of course Marcus looks bomb as hell. "Hi." I say simply. "Hey, you." He kisses my forehead and lifts up a Victoria's Secret bag I didn't know he had. He hands it to me and I think about my back to school gift. I look inside and it's lingerie and souvenirs, from his most recent trip to Jamaica. Must be nice. "Aww  this is so nice. Thank you!" I love snow globes and he got me two of them. They're beautiful. "I didn't want to give you a gift at work and not anyone else." He laughs. "I understand that." I laugh. Even though we haven't gotten back to our normal "relationship" he still thought of me. He's so sweet. I mean Devin is sweet, too, but he doesn't give me the same butterflies Marcus does. That's the problem.

We chill for a few hours and I begin to think that we'd be okay. Wrong. He's laying in my bed and all I want to do is hop on top of him. "What?" He asks. I didn't even realize he was looking at me. "Come here." He pulls me onto his lap. Before I can protest, he starts kissing my neck. That's my main weak spot. Hell, isn't it everyone's? I don't even stop him. My mind is screaming at me to stop but my body is all for this. It's like the thrill of doing wrong turned me on even more.
***
Day 1 of midterms and I'm nervous as hell. Our professor let us know that we'll get our grades as soon as we're done. This is one of the classes Zora and I have together. She's been tryna keep me on my game, since I can't do it myself. "Just focus." Zora whispers to me, before we begin our test. I nod in hopes that I actually can focus but when I look at the first question, I freak out. What the hell is this even talking about? FML.

I don't normally take over 30 minutes to take any test but here I am. Zora left 10 minutes ago but she's gonna wait for me. Her smile, leaving the class, let's me know she did well. I look over the questions one last time and get up. If it's wrong it's wrong. I hand it to the professor and he takes a moment to grade it. "Not your best work." He whispers. He hands it back to me and a flat 80 appears. I could cry. I passed but it was almost a C. "Is everything okay, Ms. West?" He asks. "No." I say simply and rush out of the room. I'm sure people think I failed but I don't care. I might as well had. There's no way I'm keeping up my honors status, if I keep this up.

I almost run past Zora, because I wasn't looking. "Hey, what happened?" She asks, worriedly. "I got an 80." I yell. "This isn't like me!" "Oh honey. It's gonna be fine. Now you know what you need to do." Zora says with a "I told you so" look. "I know. I know. I just don't know what it is about Marcus. I know who I need to be with and it's Devin but I feel like the thrill is getting to me." A wave of shock rushes across Zora's face, and it surprises me. "What?" I ask. "Who's Marcus?" I hear Devin behind me. If a soul could literally walk out of a body, mine just did it. I don't stop looking at Zora. She doesn't stop looking at me. I can tell she's sorry.

Devin walks in front of me, with flowers and a teddy bear, in hand. God, I'm so dumb. "Who's Marcus?" He asks again. I don't even know what to say. People are walking by now and I just can't deal with this. "Here I am, getting you flowers and shit but you can't seem to figure out what you want? Well I'll make it easy for you. I'm done." Devin throws the flowers and teddy bear down and marches away. I just sit there. In that moment, I realized how much I actually love him. What I have with Marcus is lust. He buys me things because he's trying to make up for time we can't spend together. Devin buys me things because he loves me and thinks I deserve them. Thought.

Zora doesn't say anything. She picks up the flowers and teddy bear. She grabs my hand and stands me up. I assume we're heading to her car because there's no way I'm driving, right now. I'll get my car later. We don't speak, the whole way to my dorm. When she parks, she takes a deep breath. "You did this to yourself. At first it seemed innocent and you and Devin weren't in a relationship. I now agree with Lilah. This has gone too far. You HAVE to end it with Marcus, now, Cher or you'll fail and you'll be lonely." Well damn, Zora. Way to kick me when I'm down. But I can't even be mad at her. What she said is true. If I'd listen to Lilah in the first place, I'd be in a happy relationship. "I know." I finally say, with tears streaming down my face.