Alexandria Montecillo

Travis Montecillo

TW: Suicide, Suicide Ideation

Hello po. Please proceed with caution and beware while reading this chapter, the last part contains a scene that shows the tags above.

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“I wanted to tell you all my secrets, but you became one of them instead.”

This is a special chapter written in Travis Montecillo's Point of View. Enjoy!

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Arianne's Birthday

       There are two disadvantages to my ability. One is being able to feel the things you don't want to feel. And the second one...

       "Let me guess.. Tita Scarlett made you wear that." Cassandra said, laughing. Ngumuso nalang ako.

       "If I refuse, Mom would surely throw a fit." Umiling nalang ako habang nakangiti. I can only imagine what my brothers think about what they're wearing right now. Si Alexandria lang naman iyong sobrang natutuwa sa pinasuot sa kanya ni Mommy. They're both alike in many ways, even though she hasn't noticed it yet.

       "Tito Nick seems to be enjoying everything though." I glanced at my parents dancing at the other side of the hall. Of course Dad would enjoy this, he supports Mom so much to the point that I don't understand it. Isa pa siya lang itong hindi nag-undergo sa dress up ni Mom, kaya tuwang-tuwa siya na kami ang pinagdiskitahan.

        "Ah, the things we do for love." Mas lalong natawa si Cassandra sa sagot ko kaya napangiti nalang din ako.

       It's good to know that she's in a better mood. I know she doesn't want me using my ability on her, but I can't help it. I'm just curious.

       Kanina pagdating ko, kahit ang daming tao, ramdam na ramdam ko ang mabigat niyang emosyon kaya hinanap ko siya agad. I found her walking the hallway and going to the garden so I followed her.

       It was suffocating. Her emotions was suffocating, and I don't even understand what it is. Asking her isn't a good idea, that's what I know. For the past ten years, I've already memorized every single thing about her. I know her like the back of my hand, so this is new to me. Nakaka panibagong hindi ko matukoy kung anong nararamdaman niya.

       It feels like she somehow blocked my ability, like what my sister unconsciously does, but not completely.

        Cassandra has been our little sunshine when Alexandria died. Nang umuwi sila galing States noong 'mamatay' ang kapatid namin, siya iyong nagdala ng ngiti sa amin. I hated her at first, I hated her smile. It was painful to see. And thinking about it now, perhaps it wasn't hatred that I felt– I was envy.

        I was envious, for my little sister. Cassandra can smile. Cassandra has the four of us, and the whole family. Cassandra is totally safe... unlike my sister. Nagagalit ako na hindi ganoon ang tinatamasa ng kapatid ko. Nagagalit ako na hindi na makakangiti ng ganoon si Alexandria. Nagagalit akong nawala kami sa kanya at nawala siya sa amin.

        I loathed the idea of spoiling her. I didn't like it when my brothers treated her nicely and even helped her during trainings. Naiisip ko palagi ang kapatid ko. The what ifs and should've beens were driving me insane.