Unanchored: Inspired by Demi Lovato (book 1 of the unanchored series)

40.⚓️

I didn't know if I really wanted to set foot in my grandparents' house again. I wasn't in a good place with them or anyone, for that matter. Let's just say that I was a difficult child. All I could do was stare at that God-awful rock that was set on my grandparents' porch and the only words that came out of my mouth were, "Damn, that is really one ugly rock." Aunt Becky looked at the rock and furrowed her eyebrows, "You mean that old thing that's been here ever since you were little." She said, pointing to the inanimate object. I rolled my eyes, looking at her, "No, I mean the Rock of Meribah, yes, I mean the rock on Oma and Opa's porch. Seriously, look at it. It's hideous." I said, putting my hands in the pocket of my sweatpants. "Okay, the rock is hideous. You've voiced your opinion and now, stop trying to stall by changing the subject. Jade, honey, I know—"

I jerked my head back, giving her a dirty look. "Don't call me honey. We're not cool like that and you're not my mom." I said. "Okay, fam? Let's just get this show on the road." I said, walking past her. She sighs and puts her key into the hole, moving it counter-clockwise. The door opened but there was no one inside and this was strange to Jade because every time she went to her grandparents' house, someone was always there.

The house was always noisy and filled with voices, even people who were friends of my grandparents used to hang there all the time and talk about how good their children are doing with their careers and their families. The subject of family, in most cultures, was important. Family is something that you should truly value and appreciate, that's something that my mom would say all the time. I never realized how much family was important until I got older. Despite not being in a good place with my family, I still loved them but I just couldn't go back to live with either of them because of the place that I am in my life right now. I am still trying to recover from my parents' death, which was four to five months ago, and I still haven't gotten over that. I don't think I ever will. I mean, I know I'm not biologically Kate and Chris's daughter, but I still loved them as if they were my birth parents.

They did everything for me, put up with my shit for sixteen years, and they gave me a home. They showed me what love was. Hell, they even gave me the best little sister in the world. God, if it wasn't for Gracie, I think I would have killed myself a long time ago. That little girl that I worry about day and night, she is my world. She is my everything. She is my anchor but even if she is my anchor, not even she can help me become anchored.

"Where is everyone? Where's Gracie?" I asked, turning around and Aunt Becky was staring me weirdly. Suddenly, flashbacks of a recent Lifetime movie that I had watched with Emma had resurfaced back to my mind and I was becoming paranoid. I kept thinking to myself that something is wrong, something is not right. Why is it so dark and quiet? "What the hell is going on?" I asked, backing away from Aunt Becky who smiling like Jack Torrance from The Shining when he tried to kill his wife.

I quickly ran by the acrylic table in the living room and picked up the silver urn on the shelf next to the table. "Hey! Back the hell away from me, Sigourney Weaver or I swear to God, I will—" I yelled.

"Jade, you better not drop—"Aunt Becky scolded. "Don't drop what? That thun thun?" Jade! Don't you dare! Put Uncle Calvin down, now!" She yelled and I shook my head.

"Uncle Calvin?!" I screamed, dropping the urn to the floor. "Oh, my goodness! Jade, look what you just did!" Aunt Becky yelled, running to salvage the rest of the ashes that were scattered all over the carpet.

"That's where he went?! I thought you guys told me that he lived in Alaska!" I yelled. "He does live in Alaska, I was just saying that so you would put the urn down because I know you can't stand Uncle Calvin. For Christ's sake, the man touched dead bodies every day and smells like onions, who loves to be around him?" Aunt Becky asked, furrowing her eyebrows. She shook her head and ran her fingers through her hair. "Well, then if Uncle Calvin is alive, who's that?" I asked, pointing to the ashes in Aunt Becky's hand. Aunt Becky got up off of her knees and stood up, pressing her hands against her face in distress. "It was Theo." Theo? Why does that name ring a bell? Wait a minute, is she for real? "Theo? Your cat. I didn't know you kept his ashes here." I said. "Your Uncle Stan is clumsy, so, I figured that I would just keep them here." She admitted. As I stood there awkwardly, I kept playing with my hands because I did not know what to do. Should I comfort her or should I watch her cry? Maybe, I should comfort her and be nice, I mean, after all, I have been a complete bitch to her ever since the day I could speak. Ugh. Fucking hell. I groaned, slowly walking over to Aunt Becky to somewhat console her.

"You know what," Aunt Becky clears her throat and runs her fingers through her hairs. She sighs and smiles at me, rubbing the remaining few ashes against her scrubs. "It's fine. I'll just get something to sweep this up later, I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise." Aunt Becky grinned and I looked at her as if she had ten heads. "Surprise?" I asked, wrinkling my eyebrows in dismay. "Surprise!" I turned around to see all of my family jumping out from behind the couches in the living room. I dropped my mouth, not finding the words that I wanted to say to Aunt Becky. I turned to her and asked, "I thought you said that you were going to take me to see Gracie so that I can say my last goodbye before she moves in with you."

Aunt Becky shook her head and said, "No, I was only saying that to get you to come to the house." "Oh," I nodded. "So, what's the occasion? Is it Nieuwjaarsduik already?"

"No. Nieuwjaarsduik was in January. Remember, it's New Year's Day?" Aunt Becky asked. I shook my head. "Jade." Uncle Manny called and I answered with, "Yes." He walked towards me and said, "Kid, today is March 23rd. Today's your birthday, remember?" He asked. "Oh, shit. I completely forgot. Sorry, guys, it's just everything is crazy right now and I didn't even think that you guys would remember. I didn't even remember my own birthday." I chuckled. "But, um...thank you, guys so much. I would love to stay for the cake if there is any."

"There is," Opa said, carefully holding the blue cake with burning candles on top of it in his hands. "Opa? I...you didn't have to do this. Neither of you guys." I said, feeling a little guilty for the way that I had been treating my family and yet they still managed to throw me a surprise party. I was really speechless. "Honestly, guys. I would love to stay but I have to get back to school." "But I already signed you out." Aunt Becky chimed in. "But, Nick is going to be looking for me," I said. "Nick? Demi's husband? Are you staying at Demi's? I thought you were staying with Michaela."

"I did," I said, rolling my eyes. "So, did something happen?" Aunt Becky asked. "Can you just not right now?" I asked politely as Aunt Becky backed away from me and Uncle Stan wrapped his arms around his wife. "Thank you, guys. Really." I noticed that everyone was here but my sister and my heart was beating so fast. "Where's Gracie?" I asked and everyone put their head down. Now, I was getting angry and pissed off. "Will somebody please explain to me, where the hell is my sister? If you don't tell me where she is right now, I swear to God, I will—"

"She's in a session right now with Dr. Brenner right now," Oma spoke up and everyone glared at her. "A session for what?!" I angrily asked. "Jade, please don't. You shouldn't have to find out like this." Aunt Becky said, trying to touch me but I smacked her hand away. "What is my sister doing talking to Judy? Why is she talking to my fucking therapist." "Because she's a danger to herself," Opa confessed. "How is she a danger to herself? What could she have possibly done to make her so dangerous?" No one spoke. Just like it was silent when I first entered the house, it was the same way. Uncle Manny clears his throat and says, "She tried to stab herself with a knife." What? Not my baby sister? She's only four. How does she know where the knives are if my oma always hides them from her. She's only a baby. Why would she try to do that, I asked myself. Oh, God. This is all my fault.