Anorexia, it kills - 01 ~ Yoongi X Bts ~

Mistaken,

We all waited inside, the bill had already been paid. They were taking much longer then any of us had expected. As the minutes passed, I felt guilty. I'm the only who made him cry. I'm the one who bitched out at him, out of an old hatred. Why did it even come out? He's been kind to me, forever. Even when, yeah, he kind of tore my heart into pieces. Even though he did it in the kindest way possible. His heart isn't as delicate as mine, but I think I just hurt him. Again. That's why he ended things, because he was too afraid to break. People like him, admit to those things. Because he's a good person, unlike me. I may have just sent him to the same place me and Yoongi have been. Which is surely not the best destination.

What makes this over the top worse on my behalf, I didn't go after him to apologize. I didn't comfort him, and make up for my wrong doings. My own boyfriend did. That's really low of me. Not taking proper initiative for my mistake? And having to make Yoongi do that. And I'm jealous that Yoongi left to comfort him! Gah, this is so stupid. I'm done with my brain right now, I hope he's fine.

"Why on earth did you say that?" Jin repeats, snapping me out of my thoughts once again, "What was the reasoning for doing...that! Seriously, tell me. Because it really makes no sense to me!"

"I'm so sorry..." I say, checking my eyes for tears. There are someone. There shouldn't be any. No, actually, there should. Because I'm weak, for saying that to him.

"Where did that even come from?" He asks, shaking his head ecstatically at me, "That is a sensitive subject, for everyone. You've experienced it, and now you just.... SAY he should go through it too?!?"

"I'm sorry," I whisper, "I don't really know where it came from, to be honest. I'm just mad at him for some reason today. I don't know what's so wrong with me. Just, old feelings came up; he is my ex after all. I was just mad at him and at myself."

Taehyung nods slowly, "Jimin, it's okay. We're all mad, we can't deny that. We're all surprised. But you will be forgiven, because you are sorry. Very, sorry."

I nod, wiping my eyes, "Thanks Tae.."

"No problem," he says, eyes still beaming on the door, "ugh, he didn't even seem too well earlier. I think he might've been feeling a bit sick, I should've asked earlier.. this is all my fault.."

Namjoon shakes his head, "This isn't your fault, it's going to be fine. Let's just, get our minds off the conflict at hand. For now, it doesn't help anyone to just sit here and worry about it."

We all nod in agreement, but just as that decision is made; they walk in. Sit at the table, and all eyes are on them.

Eyes tear stained. Just Jungkook, though. Luckily, I guess.

I grip harshly onto the sides of my chair, and look at him. He avoids eye contact, so I make the stupid decision to run over and.. hug him.

To my, and everyone's, surprise he hugs me back. Very tightly, as if he just isn't ever going to let go. "I'm sorry," I mumble into his ear, let out a quick sigh of relief.

"It's fine..." he mutters, "I know why you did it. So I don't really care." He lets go, and walks over to Taehyung. He takes a seat on Taehyung's lap, and I gulp in envy. No.

Taehyung wraps his arms firmly around Jungkook, and kisses his cheeks. I swallow, and sit back at my seat. Yoongi is extremely ignorant of me, but I just have to let it be. It's my fault for being a complete asshole earlier.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

We board the plane, and I sit with Yoongi, and Jin. Not that everyone is still really pissed at me, but they've decided to take a 'much needed' break from me.

"Don't think about it too much. It takes a bit of time," Yoongi sighs, "I know you don't want to hear it, but you really hurt him."

"But...I hugged him. He hugged me back..." I say softly, resting my head on his chest.

That had to mean something right? I couldn't have lost his trust, and my friendship with him. He isn't going to ignore me, and keep everyone away from me forever. They're going to talk to me soon, I'm sure of it.

"It's just like how it was for me before," Yoongi chuckles to himself, "Everyone didn't care. Everyone didn't mind me being gone both physically and mentally."

"Yoongi..." I say, clenching my jaw slightly at his words. They hurt like needles to my heart, because I was on of those people who did that to him.

"But, didn't that end? Yes, it did. That was rhetorical, Jin," Yoongi chuckles, staring at Jin who looks like he was about to respond to Yoongi's question.

I laugh under my breath, and smile at them, "Thanks for the slight bit of comforting to me." He runs his hand through my hair, and smiles, 'of course'

"Just get married already," Jin groans, throwing an empty bottle of water at our heads. He laughs too himself, realizing the death threatening look on Yoongi's face.

I smile subtlety, and lean back more onto Yoongi. I finally feel a little bit at peace. At least. Pure, and utter, tranquility in me.