On The Cold Night

62

Hani kept herself busy looking at the window which reveals the beautiful stars but it wasn't enough to make herself not to notice Ken's presence who at the time is sitting. He claimed to have trouble sleeping like Hani and now, it looks like it's only the two of them are awake but Ravi is actually also awake. He is just laying on his space, deep in thoughts. Ken is sitting on his spot, his back leaning against the wall and lost in the balstful music he is listening. Trying to distract himself from Hani. He knew she's doing the same but Hani isn't totally doing the same. She is distracting herself not to notice him not because she wants to but because she needed. She need to control herself especially that she is assuming that he and Kyungri are together now. Small tears finally escaped her eyetail which caused her to wiped them immediately and Ken to see from his peripheral view what she did.

"Shit!" she silently muttered to herself. Ken sighed again and stood up making Hani panicked as she found out that he is already in front of her. She gasped unintentionally so Ken smiled assuringly at her.

'No, Hee-yeon. You can't hug him just because he is approaching you....careful....you need to act proper now.'

"May I sit here?" he asked, pointing at the side of the bed. Since she don't know what to do and what to feel, she just nodded. Ken sat and looked at the window as well. He knew her so much that he is aware of the fact that she'll feel more okay when in an uncomfortable situation, the person she feels awkward with isn't facing her while making conversation. "Will you hear me out now?" he asked. Hurt is on his tone and Hani is aware of the pain that bloomed from his sentence. She had never let him explain when there is actually nothing for him to explain. Knowing he can't see her nodding her head, she was forced to let out her small hoarse voice.

"O-okay." Ken breathed out first, seemingly trying to gather more courage which he successfully did.

"I've talked to Jin. He explained everything to me. Don't worry because we're in good terms now. We actually had some fun time after that.....he also...told me that he rejected you....and said it's for the best of you....that doesn't have anything with me, though. But still, I am glad that he made you understand him without being hurt so much....he..........is such a nice guy." Hani hiccuped softly. How she wants to make him understand that Jin is really a nice guy for making her realize that it's not him that she actually falling for but him, Ken. "He alsp told me that you want to make it up with me which I assume you wouldn't want me to find out but....I also assume that you don't know how to do it which is why I'm here." He finally turned to her which surprised her. She hurriedly wiped the new tears on her cheeks. Ken held her hands to stop her and resumed what she started that only made her cry more. "....I don't want to make it harder for you. It's hard for me to do this too but you are....precious to me...I'm sorry I know I'm just a friend but you are still important to me....because you're my friend....I hope we can still stay like that." Hani can't contain herself anymore as she pushed his hands away and covered her face instead. Ken pained from those actions brcause he took those actions as rejection but he decided not to assume things and be straught forward. If he can know something now, why not pushed his chaotic heartbeat to it's limit and ask for it. "....w-why? A-am I that unworthy-" Hani quickly took his arm while the other remain on her face and her head still bowed. It made Ken stop and wait. Hanj shook her head eagerly.

"....n-no..." Ken knew she's having trouble speaking for crying that much. She obviously calmed herself forcefully as she took several deep breaths then when she's able to speak, she kept her head low. "....I'm...the sorry one...I'm stupid-" Ken quickly hugged her and soothed his back like how he usually do to her.

"Shhh....you don't force yourself to speak just to insult yourself. Hmm? It's okay. I get your apologetic words. No more unnecessary things." he said while bringing as much closure that they've lost. Even how much she wants to return the hug, she can't do it, thinking she'll be more than worst for fullfiling her own comfort even after knoeing the fact that Ken is owned by someone. It hurts Ken but he is the guy and he needs to act like that. To make comfort himself, he just brushed the thought away so he'll be able to maintain the comfort for Hani. Her sniffles grew again but like before, she forced herself again to stay okay.