The Waves of Her Memories

The Waves 22

Why do you lie to someone you love?

Because you're too afraid to be left when they found out the truth

Buong maghapon yata akong tulog at kapag nagigising ay naguguluhan padin at hindi ko malaman ang gagawin ko.I want to ask bryan about the flowers and poems I want to tell him everything that happened.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit ganito ako biruin ng kapalaran o ang kapalaran ang gumagawang biro sa buhay ko...

Sa bawat oras ay mas lalong bumabalik saakin ang mga nangyare...

Siguro kung mas maaga kong nalaman ang lahat ay naagapan ko ang pagkalitong nararamdaman ko ngayon..

Pilit kong inuunawa ang lahat at iniisip kung ano ba ang susunod kong magiging hakbang.

I stare at my phone as Bryan sent the nth message and I haven't reply in any of those. It just felt like I've done something so bad that I couldn't speak to him through phone.

I actually want to tell him everything face to face...

_

After a long moment of thinking and talking to myself I decided to call bryan and ask him if he could meet me in a café and he said he could leave a little early.

Alam ko na nagtataka na sya pero sabi ko ay may gusto lamang akong sabihin.

I don't exactly know what to say but I don't wanna keep this for too long.Kahit sabihin nay un lang yon ay pakiramdam ko ay napaka big deal.

I arrived a little early at the place, dapat ay susunduin nya ako pero pinilit ko na dito na kami magkita.

It wasn't that long till I saw my man walking towards me.

"Hey, sorry I was late." He said as he kissed my cheeks..Kinakabahan ako sa mga mangyayare pero eto na to..Wala nang atrasan pa

"No, Maaga lang din ako dumating." I said and he smiled.Itinuro ko naman ang upuang nasa harap ko senyas na maupo sy roon, na kanya naming ginawa.

"Akala ko ay may hangover ka pa.."he said as he sat

"I'm fine but I just need to talk too you immediately."Seryoso kong sabi sa kanya habang nakatingin sa kamay ko.

"Well let's order first so we can talk." He said on which I agreed and we ordered.

"I was thinking 'bout it earlier I'm sorry if I didn't reply in any of your messages.Naisip ko na kausapin kangg agad at hindi na ipagpabukas pa ito"I started to talk as the waitress leave us with our orders.

He left a tiny chuckle, "You're making me a bit nervous baby.Ano ba ang kailangan nating pagusapan."Tanong nya sakin at batid mo ang pagkabagabag sa kanyang tinig kahit na itinatago nya ito.

Huminga ako ng malalim at siinabi ko, "I came here to talkto you, for two things."I looked away and bited my lips.

"What's bothering you baby?" he ask worriedly. He reached for my hands, determined to tell everything I continued to speak,

"One, it to tell you the truth," I said, nakita ko ang pagkunot ng noo nya at napyuko nalamang ako.

"What truth?"he ask to me with his eyes looking straight

"Kahapon, nalasing ako, something happened.--." Itinuloy ko ang kwento ko sa kung paano ang nangyari sa bar noon, "I was already drunk and I decided to go to the comfort room,when someone dragged me."He was looking at me intently and listening attentively to what am I saying.Pinaglalaruan ko angkamay ko sa kaba at walang alinlangang kong sinabi

"He asked me why, would I say yes to you." I want to tell him everything so even when my voice was a little trembling, " He- said something about me forgetting about him which a little bit confusing..Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit sa tono nya ay kilala nya ako, Bryan, That man it's Liam-."

"Mr Marquez?" He cutted me as He unbelievingly asked and I just nodded,

"And then?" tanong nya pa, I was about to continue but "Teka kilala ka nya?Paanong Hindi mo sya kilala?"He asked me nanagpaisip din saakin at hindi ko pa iyon naisip ng una doon ko na alala

"I had an amnesia But i- I refuse to take medications for it since I'm fine now."I said to him but the thought keeps bugging me at the back of my mind.

Although I was bothered by that I kept my focus and continue to a thing that I think will shake and make my man angry

I held his hands "Something happened after that."I said

"Ano pa ang sinabi nya?"at unti unti ay umiling ako sa kanya, "He didn't say anything after but-."I paused and looked at him squeezing his hand, as I said slowly "He actually kissed me."

I looked at his eyes at bahagyang nanlaki ang mga ito at batid mo ang pagkagulat sa kanyang mata napailing, bumulong ng ilang katagang alam ko ay puro mura.

"Why-Why did he fucking kiss you?"he asked me while he was gritting his teeth

I looked down as I shook my head, I was confused why he did that.

I caress his hand and calm him down, "I slapped him and asked him why he did that and his answers lead me to the second thing we need to talked about, after I told you the truth, I want to hear the truth from you.."I paused and he was also confused

"What truth?"He asked me, this bothered me but I know I need the answer from him too not just from what liam had told me

"The flowers and the poems"I said and paused as I caught him be uncomfortable for a while and breathed heavily

Tinignan ko sya ng derecho, "Akala ko ay bigay mo pero hindi? Diba?" hindi sya sumagot kaya nag tuloy akong magsalita, I was kinda emotional for the answer I was looking for was being showed in my eyes

Napansin ko ang paglunok nya at ang maluha-luha nyang mata na tumitig sa akin.
"Baby," He softly whispered

"Is it true?" pagtatanong ko pa kahit na ang sagot ay malinaw ko nang nakikita sa mga mata nya..

"I'm sorry" he said as he held my hands tighter.Ang kanyang tugon ay malinaw na sagot sa tanong na bumabagabag sakin.

"I never intended to lie to you baby it's just-"

I moved my hands away holding the cup of the coffee i ordered and felt its warmness as I felt like a bucket of a cold ice was poured into me.

"Bryan you see, maybe it wasn't a big deal, but you still lied to me, from the very start,kahit nagging tayo na ay din sinabi." I said while looking him and he was just there crying with his eyes begging for forgiveness.

"I know baby, I'm really sorry." He said to me again..

Now I am not mad that I didn't knew about it earlier but I am disappointed and hurt that he lied to me, out of all the people I never expected for him to do that considering that I trust him so much.

Napabuntong hininga ako at pinunasan ang lumandas na luha sa pisngi ko.

"I hate being the reason you're crying now baby." He whispered under his breath

I don't know what to do but I just want to be alone right now so I decided to leave my money on the table and not caring about the change I stood up and he looked at me questioning...

"I paid for us.Now I need to go." I said as i go he help my hand but I removed it.Shaking my head I walked away.He

Sinundan padin nya ako at hanggang sa parking ay tinatawag nya pa ako.

I was about to go when I opened the door of my car but he hold it.

"Please baby I'm really sorry.Don't leave me." He was begging right to me. So I faced him and held his face

"I am not leaving you.You lied to me Bryan, I just want to think for a while.Yung ako lang hayaan mo muna ako." I said as he helplessly let go and I close my door and drove home.