Verity's Book 2.0

Writing Reflections

EDIT: I wrote this at 1:30 a.m. this morning, was super-busy all day, came back to read with trepidation what my zero-filter brain had produced, and after careful deliberation decided to post it anyway. Welcome to Verity's passionate side. We are a little embarrassed of her during daylight hours. We hope you enjoy your stay.

I'm going to say something important.

Your first draft doesn't have to be trash.

More importantly, your first draft won't necessarily be trash.

I have spent years feeling strangely at odds with much of the writing world, wondering if I was stuck-up for working so hard on my first drafts, for thinking my first-draft writing was actually fine, for loving my finished writing more the more time it had been finished.

Y'all, I published a first draft.

I seriously published a partial first draft. The last nine chapters of The Journey are virtually unaltered from their original form, barring my editor's comma insertions that I have more or less given up understanding.

And I felt like a cheater, because... you're not supposed to do that? First drafts are supposed to be garbage? I wanted to feel proud, but I felt like I'd bypassed the system somehow. Like I was hiding something dirty in my closet.

So I'm here to call out the unilateral trashing of first-drafts.

The maxims:

"It's just a first draft."

"The first draft is just your story figuring itself out."

"First drafts are meant to be a mess."

"The sole purpose of first drafts is to get to the second draft."

Very nice maxims. And, like all maxims... not universal.

I have a rebel streak, as you all know, and I'm going to briefly give it full leash.

My first draft is my story creating itself under my fingers, transferring from mind to paper every emotion, every delicate theme, every person and action that's been playing in my head for years. My first draft is shaping visualization into words and concept into reality. My first draft is recording songs, dialogue, and ancient scripts. My first draft is not "just" anything.

My first draft is figured out.

My first draft is not a mess.

My first draft's purpose is to give me joy as I write it.

Yes, my first drafts are not void of mistakes, and have their rough spots. Sometimes I change a name or plot point midway through. But I work hard at them. (I have tried to just toss care aside and treat it like it's a "first draft" and doesn't matter. Can't do it. Like, seriously? I'm replicating what I see in my head, and it's important to get that right on the first try. Once you have a secondary source to rely on [your first draft], your primary source gets muddy -- assimilated into the draft, and it's hard to remember where you went wrong.) I've been at this writing game for 13 years, assimilating every trick in the book, and I think I can turn out decent prose on the first try.

Let's put it this way:

Your very first draft will inevitably be garbage (mostly, probably, and unless you're some weird genius, all viable possibilities)

Your twentieth first draft will not be garbage (mostly, probably, and unless you've done your dead-level best to learn absolutely nothing in the interim, again all viable possibilities)

It might seem silly to make such a deal out of this, but today I finally found out that there are other people who believe that not all first drafts are equal. For the first time in a while, I feel allowed to believe that my first drafts are as much as they really are, and I want to pass this on to whoever might be feeling the same.

I understand the bent towards all the first-draft maxims. Imperfection is natural. Writers need encouragement. And it really is okay if your first draft is trash.

Just... it's okay if it's not trash, too.