Forever To Be Loved

Chapter Seven

Enjoy!

Chapter Seven

My dad was never one to show his emotion, the total opposite of my mother, who always showed her feelings. My dad is what you would call taciturn, always reserved; the only emotions shown were anger and love. He didn't cry when his mother passed away, and he didn't cry when his dad had a heart attack. It was like he was a robot, going through the phases of life without a hint at what he was really feeling.

So when I saw him yesterday, eyes red, brimming with tears, my heart ached. To think what he must have felt like, seeing his little girl, terribly sick, and dying, it made me feel bad. When I left, I wanted to make sure that my family would be okay; that my dad could hold the family together when they're all breaking down. I don't know how I feel now that my dad couldn't even keep it together.

I was currently sat crisscrossed on the hospital bed, watching my dad move across from the foot of my bed to the windowsill grabbing the flowers and teddy bear that Aiden brought me.

"Who got these?" he asks quietly.

"A friend from school," I say blushing slightly.

"Really? You were only here for a day," my dad says, stating the obvious.

"Yeah," I say nodding.

"Sah'nai," my dad says at the same time that I say, "Daddy,"

"Go ahead," he says sitting down on the edge of my bed.

"Why did you leave me yesterday?" I ask frowning.

My dad cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Sah'nai, you don't understand what it feels like to know that your little girl is sick and there is nothing you could do about it. I couldn't just sit there and watch you go through that. To see you in pain," he closes his eyes. "If I could make you better Sah'nai, I would in a heartbeat,"

My eyes started stinging and almost immediately, the tears burst through, causing my body to shake and my dad wrapped his arms around my body, holding me to his chest as I cried.

"Daddy I don't want you to feel like that. Trust me, this isn't as bad as it can get. I'm not hurting as much as you think I am," I say pulling back to look my dad in the eyes, the exact same eyes that I have inherited from him.

"You promise you're not hurting?"

"Not really. Some days are worse than the others, but I feel fine right now,"

"Okay," my dad nodded.

"Dad, do you wish that I would do the chemo?" I ask gently.

"I would Sah'nai. But it's time that you start making choices for yourself now, and if doing chemo is something you're opposed to, than I accept that. No matter what you decide, I will always be there for you."

"Thank you Daddy," I say kissing his prickly cheek.

My dad let me go and stood up. "We got to get going, so I'm going to go discharge you. You ready?"

I nod. "Yeah, let me just get my things," I say moving to the window and grabbed my flowers and giant teddy bear.

"Oh, here's some shoes," my dad say handing me a pair of flats from the plastic chair, taking my stuff from my arms.

"Good," I giggle. "I thought I was going to have to go home without any shoes," I say slipping them on. It was already bad enough that I had to wear my pajamas from yesterday home; I thought I was going to have to go barefoot.

As soon as I got home I went straight to the bathroom, stripping myself out of the dirty pajamas, and into a hot and refreshing shower; thoroughly washing my body and my hair, and when I was done with that I brushed my teeth until it hurt.