Chapter 48- Overboard
"So crazy is this thing we call love. Now that we've got we just can't give up. You got me out here in the water and I'm overboard. I need your love to pull me up. It feels like I'm drowning without your love."~ Justin Bieber
Justin's POV
I stare at my ceiling as I wait for sleep to take over. I've been laying down for almost an hour but it seems like my brain doesn't want to close down for the night. I can't help the heavy feeling in my heart and the feeling of wanting to cry. My decision lays heavily on my chest and a small part of me is thinking that I made the wrong choice.
Having to watch her run away like that was heart-breaking but I know it will benefit her long term. All I keep doing is bringing her unhappiness. Even if she doesn't find happiness with Douche, she will find it with someone who deserves her and as much as it kills me, that person isn't me. Even if she feels something I can't give her the normal happiness that she wants. I will always be in spotlight of the media. She will have to deal with any small mistake I make and hate for just being with me. I know that isn't something that she wants and I will never put her through that. The same way she will never let me give this up for her. My Bee isn't selfish like that. It's one the traits I love most about her.
And then there is Miley. The girl who is in love with me and I didn't realise. When did she fall for me? The bigger question is what will I do about it? I can't just jump into a relationship with her while my heart lies with someone else. It wouldn't be fair on her. I can only be with her when I know it's really something I want. I try and envision a future with her. She's the ideal girlfriend for a pop star like me. My fans ship me with her and they accept her. She knows how to deal with the rumours and the paparazzi. She understands the stress of being under the spotlight. But she doesn't know Justin Bieber. She knows Justin Bieber. She doesn't know what kind of life I lived before. She doesn't know how much I cried when I realise that my dad wasn't around. She doesn't know how much I freak out at just hearing about head lice. She doesn't have chocolate chip pancakes races with me. She never sits with me when I play video games like a normal teenage boy. She isn't my Bee.
I lay in silence as the heavy feeling in my chest spreads and tears form in my eyes. The heartache of losing her is killing me but I have been selfish for too long. I jump when I hear something smash across the hallway. Amber's room. I jump out of bed and rush outside of her room. I go to open the door but I stop myself. I hear her scream and shout as things continue to smash in her room. I hear a thud against the wall as she screams the words 'I hate you'. I feel a sinking in my heart as I realise that I've caused this. It's my fault that she is having this breakdown and is crying. I jump when something hits the bedroom door again and again. Tears fall over my eyes and realisation hits me full-blown. What have I done? The room goes silent except for her quiet sobs I can hear through the door. I turn back and enter my room again. I shut the door and slide down it. I pull my knees to my chest and try and stop my tears but they don't relent. What have I done to her? And as I sit there crying to myself I realise exactly what I've done.
YOU ARE READING
Fall- A Justin Bieber Love Story
FanfictionFall Series: BOOK 1 He wants to say 'I love you' but keeps it to goodnight, because love will mean some falling and she's afraid of heights. Well let me tell you a story about a girl and a boy. He fell in love with his best friend when she is around...