Alec Lightwood Fanfic

11

11

As I mentioned before, I have an anxiety disorder; well it sometimes gives me nightmares so bad that I scream in my sleep. I don't remember it and I don't know I'm doing it, but it's a pain for anyone near me - Harry used to just leave my apartment in the night when it happened and come back in the morning, and he'd never let me sleep over at his house.

Anyway, as I said, I don't know when it's happening so I didn't realise until I had Alec shaking me awake, the concern prominent on his face.

"Elle! What happened?"

I woke up sweating and panting, this nightmare had been one of the worst yet, and I didn't trust my voice not to break so I just shook my head and leaned on him. He surprised me by pulling me round, so my head was in his lap as he stroked my hair.

"Elle?"

"Can you stay the night? Please."

He nodded and locked my apartment door, which I must have forgotten to do since he was in here. I crawled back under the covers and he was a gentleman and lied down on the floor.

"Alec - up here?"

"Oh yeah," he stuttered, and awkwardly crawled in beside me, lying flat on his back. I picked his arm up and put it around me so I could cuddle closer. I felt him stretch up to look at me, but I had my eyes closed and just wanted to sleep.

"Catching feelings?"

"Shush you're warm," I shot back.

He relaxed and unlike Harry, was still there when I woke up.

"Wanna tell me what that was last night?" he asked softly, standing up and stretching.

"Never tell anyone or I'll kill you but I have an anxiety disorder which gives me vivid nightmares and sometimes I scream in my sleep without realising. Sorry I woke you up."

I didn't know what he was going to say and I didn't want to find out, so I locked myself in the bathroom and got in the shower. When I came out, Alec was gone and I guess I was relieved. I'd managed to avoid him as much as I could around the institute and instead spent time with others.

He finally cornered me in the corridor and I couldn't get away.

"Elle, please talk to me. What's going on?" He spoke softly and his voice and eyes were laced with concern.

"Look, I feel embarrassed okay. Usually I don't tell people stuff about me and I definitely don't usually let people share a bed with me. I - I just wanted you to know that."

"You know, I don't think about you any differently because of that night. If you get like that again I'm more than happy to keep you company."

No one had ever been that nice to me, especially about my nightmares - I was never invited to sleepovers as a kid because the other kids were scared after I'd had a nightmare on an overnight school trip once. Before he could say anything else I hugged him tightly, and after the initial shock of the contact, he squeezed me back gently too.

We decided to make a code - three knocks on the wall was a signal for the other one to come over, in case I wanted company at night again. My nightmares hadn't been too bad but Alec had kept his word and came round every time I knocked.