MAC: FACTS AND UPDATES

Please Help.

I don't think anyone really reads these anymore, but it's worth a try. I just really really need someone to listen to me and I haven't got anyone else.
My mum is really unwell with cancer, and I've been looking after her on my own. My dad works overseas and is finding this really tough.
She's going to have to go through chemotherapy. And I've really really been struggling with school and life in general.
My older sister can't drive and I don't think she really cares, so she hasn't come home. My older brother has been going out to the club with all of my friends while I stay at home and look after mum.
It's so hard, because no part of me wants to be alive anymore, but I have to. Because mum needs me. And if the tumour doesn't go away she can't deal with this on her own.
My whole family depends on me.
I want to drop out of school to help her.
I certainly can't go to university anymore.
I just wish I could wake up now. I'm done with all of this.

Everyone who has gone through a similar situation always tells other people not to take their loved ones for granted, and to tell them you love them everyday.
Well I have never taken her for granted.
I tell her I love her every single time I see her.
So why. Why does this have happen to her.

Sorry for rambling. I just haven't told anyone that my mum has cancer. And wanted to vent somewhere.
Look after yourself.
Thank you.