5 Seconds of Summer BoyXBoy one-shots

Second Chance // Cashton

~ So here we have it, part two of If You Only Know :) 

This too is dedicated to @calumsthingortwo and I love you a whole lot okay? ily xx :) /M~ 

Calum is miserable, there’s no other way to put it. He left Ashton to go home, to try and work things out with his parents, and ever since he left he’s felt like there’s a knife in his chest, slowly twisting and making it harder for him to breathe. He thought going back home would make things better, thought that if he talked to his mum and dad they’d understand. He was wrong. They don’t want to understand, they don’t want to see what he sees. They don’t understand that he wants to do this, that he wants to try and live his dream with Ashton. And now that might all be ruined. He left Ashton without an explanation, without a reason, and Ashton has no reason to take him back. It was a mistake, Calum should have known better than to go home thinking he’d get them to understand. They don’t care, all they want is for Calum to get a good job and make a lot of money, preferably get married to a girl and have a few kids too. They refuse to see that what he wants is to open a record store with Ashton. He wants to get married with Ashton, he wants to get a dog and maybe even one or two kids with him. He doesn’t want a fancy job where he has to wear a suit every day, he doesn’t want to get married to a girl. Vaginas scare him for gods sake! He just wants to be happy but he wants to make his parents proud. They don’t care though, like previously stated. They’re keeping him there, basically a prisoner in his own home, and doesn’t say as much as two words to him.

Maybe things could have been different, but they’re not and here he is, sitting by the window in his room, watching the world pass him by outside. He knows that every minute he spends there is another minute Ashton’s drifting further away from him, he knows he needs to do something. And so he does. He gets up, walking over to his desk and rummaging through the drawers until he finds what he’s looking for, a notebook. He then walks back to the window, grabbing a pen on his way, and sits back down. once he finds a clean page he starts writing, he writes down what he knows his parents won’t ever hear, and then he gets up. He leaves the note on the pillow, knowing they’ll find it when they get home, or tomorrow, before quickly gathering the things he brought with him and leaving the room. As he closes the door the note falls open, making it possible for anyone who could have entered the room to read it in the light from the setting sun.

 

Mum. Dad.

I know you’ll be mad when you find this, don’t even try to deny that. But I need you to understand that I tried. I really tried the best I could to make you realize that this is my life we’re talking about. MY life. I need to do whatever I can to be happy, and you’re not helping. At all.

I’m not angry, really I’m not. I’m just saying that you’re stopping me from being happy with who I am and I can’t have that, not when it affects the people I love. So this is goodbye. It’s not “I’ll see you” later or “I’ll call you”. This is goodbye. You can contact me if you ever change your mind and realize that this is who I am but until then we won’t have any contact. This is goodbye, but maybe it’ll be a second chance for all of us as well.

With love.

Calum xx

 

~

His hands are shaking slightly when Calum knocks on the familiar door. He has no idea what to expect, what to do or what to say. He doesn’t know where to go if Ashton won’t take him back, he doesn’t know what he’ll do with his life if Ashton doesn’t want to be a part of it.

“Calum?” The door has opened without him noticing and there, in front of him, is Ashton. He looks awful, although Calum’s sure he looks just as bad, and he looks so...broken. “Calum?”

“I’m so sorry Ashton, I’m so so sorry.” Ashton nods and steps forward, wrapping his arms around Calum’s neck.

“I missed you, I didn’t want to bother you so I didn’t call you but I missed you so much.” he whispers. Calum doesn’t know what to say so he just hugs back, carefully as if he’s scared Ashton will break, and after a few minutes he picks him up, just as carefully, and walks into the apartment. Ashton doesn’t say anything, he just smiles softly against Calum’s neck, and Calum relaxes, knowing that he won’t get thrown out now.

“I’ll explain everything.” he promises, and that’s a promise he keeps. Once they’ve showered and eaten, when they’re in bed holding each other, protected from the outside world by a few blankets, he tells Ashton everything, about his dreams, about his parents and about how he was scared to tell Ashton before because he thought he’d leave him. But Ashton assures him, promises he won’t leave, and soon they fall asleep, smiling, knowing that they’ve gotten a seconds chance.