Guardian ✓

terror

NO ONE COULD FAKE BEING OKAY WHEN THEY SLEPT.

As was the case with Emma. A frequently occurring nightmare that haunted her was not of constantly being taken against her will. No. It was of the way she scratched another line to her tally after they were done with her. The hollow feeling after. It was the thought of no one ever rescuing her again.

"No one would ever hurt you again," Noah murmured into her hair every night as she tucked herself into his arms.

She believed him wholeheartedly. It was hard not to believe the person you were in love with. Yet, it did not make what happened to her okay. The feeling still remained. It slowed her down to the point where she could only fake her smiles, her laughs – she could only pretend to be happy because the weight of her past was far heavier than the weight of her present.

And she hated herself for it.

While her mother bought her smiles, Noah was a whole other case. Behind his hard exterior, she could she the cracks. She could see the self-loathing that she would never be able to erase.

Ergo, she started to stay with her mother on nights she knew were going to be hard. It didn't matter how trapped – how utterly petrifying – her nightmares became. It didn't matter how haunting her screams were. Everything was going to be okay as long as her Noah didn't see her like this.

She would be fine as long as Noah didn't see her like this.

"Matthias–"

Noah pulled her to his side as she wandered over to where her precious protector stood, glaring at the innocent rabbits who frequently visited her mother's enormous garden.

He was convinced one of them was going to blow up one day.

"You're still going to ask him about where we're going?" Noah asked calmly, trying to ignore the smile that came across her lips. "Why can't you ask me? I think I've shown you plenty times I don't bite–" he looked at her collarbone which was unfortunately hidden by her sweater, "–not unless the occasion calls for it."

Before she could respond, he was gently ushering her inside the car. Matthias ignored her look as he spoke to the driver. Noah pressed a button to put up the partition before sitting back and pulling her on his lap.

"I was going to apologise for what he saw that day," Emma mumbled as scarlet coated her cheeks. "He cursed! And he never curses in front of me."

"Don't apologise," Noah commanded. "If you are embarrassed, I can always run him over with my jeep."

And then he proceeded to tell her how he had it custom-made. Of course she listened intently, focused on the way his eyes lit up. It was the only thing these days that seemed to destress him.

Well, that and making out with her.

"I know that's your way of making jokes," she began kindly, "but it makes my heart beat really fast when you casually mention killing people – which might I add is illegal. And I know you do it deliberately to scare me. Matthias told me so."

"That's why I want to run him over," Noah grumbled, making her laugh as she grabbed the glass food container from her bag and pushed down the partition.

"Matthias?" She mumbled, poking his arm.

Emma felt like she was being scolded and he hadn't even turned around to gaze at her disapprovingly.

"Yes, ma'am?" She winced at his formal register before pushing the food container in front of him.

Fortunately, both of them had a sweet tooth. So when her mother ordered her Nutella and strawberry filled crepes this morning, she saved two for Matthias.

"It's a peace offering."

Her protector was more than halfway through with his food when he turned around to glare at the two passengers in the back.

"I might need eye surgery," he deadpanned, making Noah roll his eyes as he scrolled through his phone, replying to important emails and archiving invitations to various events.

"Don't listen to him," Noah told Emma as she worried her bottom lip, unaware how considerably dark Noah's eyes had become as he watched her.

So, as soon as the partition went back up, Noah had her pinned to the leather seat.

"It's endearing that you care about such trivial matters," he murmured, kissing her jaw. "You're too kind." This, he did not mean as a compliment.

Her kindness perplexed him. Scared him. He felt as if it was going to hurt her one day – just as it had in the past.

Not even his mother was like that.

"At least," she gasped, arching her back as his fingers under her shirt, "tell me where we're going."

"Lydia's."

She jolted, "We can't do this then. You know it's hard for me to act coherent after–"

All words died on her lips as he unclasped her jeans, pulling them down. "Her home is a three hour drive. I'll give you two hours to calm down."

She blushed, burying her face in his shoulder as he placed kissed across her collarbone, admiring the love bites in the dim glow of the car. She could barely breathe as she felt the intensity of heat pool in her stomach.

"Okay?" He murmured, like always, bringing his eyes up to make sure she wanted this.

She gave him a nod, unable to speak.

He touched her thighs softly, spreading them enough so he could move closer. He had missed her this week. His workload barely managed to keep the thoughts of her at bay and so the nights without her were a new kind of torture. He didn't want to meddle too much in her life. He was terrified she'd get fed up – give him up.

Go for someone her own age. That she would realise she was making a huge mistake. No matter how much he tried to convince her of the lack of blood relationship between them, no one could deny the fact that their parents had been married once.

Her body shook with tremors as he kissed the inside of her legs, moving until his lips were pressed against the spot which embarrassed her to the core. He traced slow circles against it with his tongue, gently rubbing her thighs as she started to tense. It was getting harder to breathe.

She couldn't believe she would ever feel pleasure from this.

He looked up from time to time to make sure she was okay – that she was enjoying this as much as much as he was. He loved it when she relaxed and gave into the pleasure. There was nothing better than that.

Her cheeks became bright red as her lips parted. He gripped her legs a tad tighter, he'd never be able to forgive himself if he scared her. Or if she got hurt. She'd had enough of that to last her a lifetime.

Her hands moved to his hair before gripping the edge of the seat tightly as her fingernails dug into the leather. She gasped, letting out soft moans involuntarily.

And he was barely doing anything.

Noah didn't even want to think what she'd look like when they finally had sex. He was only going to torture himself with that image. And he wanted to take that as slowly as he possibly could. He wanted to make sure she was hundred percent ready.

It had to be perfect.

He licked and sucked faster as her shaking got worse, holding her down as she trembled.

"It's okay," he whispered against her. "Let go, baby. It's just me."

When she finally let go, her mind went blank. No thoughts, no worries existed. It felt like an out of body experience as she lay there, letting Noah clean her up. Her body felt numb in the best way possible.

"Go to sleep," he murmured as her eyes fought to stay open.

"Lydia said I need to do something as well," she slurred as he covered her with a throw, smirking slightly as tremors still shook her body.

"And what's that?"

"Suck you off."

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