My Philophobia G.D.

31

"Are you done stearing at me?"her voice comes into my thoughts.

"Oh, I'm never done with that"I joe,still thinking what I just said.

She doesn't say anything.

"What if you sing it...I didn't even read it all so sing it"

"Oh,yeah,okay."

She gets up from my lap and goes to the room in front of me.

HAILEE'S POV.

I know that when Grayson will hear every word of this song he'll want to know of what I'm talking about.I trust him but I can't tell him why I wrote those words.I regret taking him here.I know this is wrong.When I thought of doing this I felt like I wanted him to discover my world step by step, but I can't.I am afraid.

Iknow he won't hurt me because Grayson is not like everybody I met,but my mind just can0t accept it.I am afraid that he'lll leave me because of what my life will put him through.This is really stupid but I know who I am and I can't help it but be afraid.

I don't show my feeling to people but I feel like I already told him too much and I really want to stop itThe more I'll give him my soul the more he will be ableto hurt me when things will get harder.

"Hailee?"I hear Grayson say.

"Oh,sorry"I say realising I'm sitting in front of the mic.It is like when I start thinking I loose myself, I can ,ove but I don't realise where I am.

"Are you okay?"he asks seriously.

"Yeah,yeah.We can start"I say"we can read it if you play the recording button"

"Hailee are you sure you feel good?You're acting so strange"he syas standign up and stopping himself in front of the glass of the door that is dividing her.

God,stop it.Why can't I hide my feelings to him, just like I do with everybody?

"I am Grayson.Let's record"I say way too harshly.He looks at me.

"Okay"is the only thing he answers while he walks away from the door.I barelyu heard that 'okay'.

He pushes the recording button and I start singing.

"I used to shut my door while my mother screamed in the kitchen

I'd turn the music up, get high and try not to listen

To every little fight, 'cause neither one was right

I swore I'd never be like them

But I was just a kid back then

The older I get the more that I see

My parents aren't heroes, they're just like me

And loving is hard, it don't always work

You just try your best not to get hurt

I used to be mad but now I know

Sometimes it's better to let someone go

It just hadn't hit me yet

The older I get"

I feel so stupid.I am stupid.Why do I always have to ruin things?He doesn't desearve to be treated like I just did.Dmn it Hailee.Stop being such an idiot.

I take my headphones off of my ears,throw them to the floor and start walking towards the door.Grayson is confused...of course he is.

I run towards him and throw my arms around his neck.