Love & War

May We Meet Again

We get to level five, not sure what we will find. Bellamy and I walk into their mess hall, stopping. This is what I was afraid of. People lie in their plates of unfinished food. Children lie on the floor. Everyone is dead. 

I walk between the dead, looking around. Jasper looks up at me and Bellamy as we stop beside him. He sits holding a dead Maya. Her face full of blisters from the radiation. He stares at us, tears in his eyes. 

"What did you do?" He cries at us. 

"We did what we had to. They never would have stopped." Bellamy says behind me. Jasper looks down at Maya. I walk around him towards the chamber. I get there to find most of the people being unchained. I find my mother getting taken off the bed by Marcus. I run to her, holding onto her.

"I thought I lost you."

"You can never lose me." She moves her hand to my cheek, I smile holding it there. 

Morning comes and we make our way back to Camp. Lincoln finds Octavia as we walk through the forest. I can tell she is happy to see him but I know the cost he paid to be here. He will be an outcast like me. Hunted for deserting the alliance. 

We arrive back at the camp. Slowly people walk in, the ones that stayed behind helping the ones who are hurt. My mom stops beside me, putting her hand out. I grab it holding it. She can read my face. She knows that I am not coming in. She has found a home here while I still do not know where home is. 

Could I make home here? Could I make a home with Bellamy? I watch as the last people walk through the gate, leaving me and Bellamy. He steps up beside me, looking in.

"We deserve a drink." He says.

"Have one for me." I say. 

"Hey, we'll get through this." He says.

"I'm not going in." I feel his eyes on me so I look up at him.

"I know you have been through a lot. You have killed more than I could count." Tears form in my eyes. "But if you need forgiveness, I'll give it to you. You're forgiven." I start to shake my head. "Please come inside." He begs.

"Seeing them will just remind me what I did to get here."

"What we did." He says, grabbing my hands. I look down at them before looking at him. 

"I never had to see the faces of the people I saved. I always left. They will always see me for who I really am."

"You are not that person." He tries to pull me in but I pull back, letting go of his hands. "Where will you go?"

"I don't know but far away from here." I grab his shoulders bringing my lips to his. He raps his arms around my back, holding me close. A fire inside ignites. How can I leave this? Let this go? 

I rap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Savouring the moment because I do not know if we will get another. He finally pulls away, breathing hard into my mouth. Our foreheads touch as we stand there, not moving. I finally pull back staring into his face. 

I hug him, tucking my head into his neck. He does the same, tightening his hands around my back. 

"May we meet again." I say into his ear, kissing his cheek before backing away.

I turn walking down the path to the forest. Not sure where I will go. I do not turn around because if I do then I know I will go back. Run into his arms and never let go. I need to leave to save myself if it is even possible.