Christian Turners' Upward Fall (BXB)

Selfish

I woke with a searing pain in my head. My muscles ached from falling asleep in an awkward position. My mouth felt parched and I craved water. I also craved some Tylenol.

Soft snores brought my attention away from my own pain. I turned my head to gaze at Noah. I'm surprised I was at least sober enough to remember his name. He looked so peaceful as he slept.

It felt almost confirmed. I liked men. But I also liked women.

So was I bi? Or are there other terms?

I frowned at the thought of being different than the me I have always been.

Noah stirred beside me and he slowly opened his dark blue eyes. He looked a little surprised to see me awake but after a moment a small smirk made its way to his lips.

"So you're the type to fall asleep right after sex. That surprises me" he comments. I can't stop myself from blushing at his teasing.

"Whatever" I mumble.

I lift myself from my bed not caring that I'm still naked. Noah lets out a wolf whistle as I make my way to the bathroom that is connected to the room. I can't help but roll my eyes at his actions. Although to be honest it does make me smile a tad.

God I look awful. I have bags under my eyes and my hair is a total mess. I'm even a tad bit pale. My eyes make there way across my chest and I cringe. The amount of hickeys littering my skin shocks me. They pepper my skin and even look painful.

I storm back into the room and glare at Noah as I collect my clothes hurriedly.

"Have you seen the hickeys you've left on me?" I complain, propping my hand onto my hip.

"Ah I see, you mean my love bites?" He says. I roll my eyes. "What if someone sees them?" I seethe at him.

"Someone as in Claire Kirkwood?" He asks. I'm taken aback and I furrow my brows in confusion.

"You know about Claire?" I ask. He just laughs and gets up slowly.

"You mean Claire you're girlfriend? Yeah of course I do" he says as he turn towards me. I keep my eyes away from looking at his naked torso and focus on his face.

"Why'd you sleep with me if you knew I had a girlfriend?" I ask him. A dry laugh leaves his lips.

"Why'd you sleep with me if you have a girlfriend?" He says, completely countering my question.

I freeze on the spot. I have no answer. I don't know what to say. The only excuse I can think of is that she cheated on me first, but that's an incredibly childish reason for me to cheat on her right back.

I look into Noah's eyes and I see no real judgement. He is simply curious. I feel that I can be honest. Brutally honest even.

"Revenge...maybe?" I respond though it comes out as more of a question than an answer. He just nods as if he truly understands.

"I don't know. I'm not the best person in the world. I'm pretty awful at times" I say before shrugging as the honesty in my words begins to attack my guilty conscience.

"It's not that awful. You responded in a somewhat odd way, but I'm not sure if that makes you awful or not" he tells me. He leans down and grabs his clothes and starts to get dressed.

I feel relief now that I don't have to force myself to keep my eyes on the more modest parts of him.

"So how was it?" He asks. I shoot him a confused look. "This was your first time with a guy. How was it?" He says again. I look at the bed that isn't made and has an overwhelming scent of cologne.