Keeping a secret love | Juan Gomez de Liano

Kabanata 19

One thing that life taught me is that, you should not forget those who help you to achieve what you have right now. Everything will be ruined but it takes time to settle.

After that conversation with Juan, I feel sorry. He was my living diary, literally my best friend through the years but our friendship doesn't end just because of what happened.

Oo, masakit. Nasaktan ako, nadurog, pero alam kong unti unti akong mabubuo. Yung mga taong minahal ko noon, hindi ako sigurado pero sa tingin ko, makakatulong sila upang maging masaya ulit ako. Kung tatanggapin ko lahat, madadaan naman sa mabuting usapan. 

Pagkababa ko sa sasakyan nya, hindi pa rin siya nag sasalita. Should I invite him to have a tea? Coffee? Beer? Whiskey? 

"Juan, do you want to stay?" Napatingin siya sa'kin. Nagulat.

"Uhm, sure." He nodded.

Nag park lang siya ng sasakyan nya.

"Do you want to drink?" I asked, his eyebrows furrowed. Parang hindi malinaw yung tinatanong ko.

"Uhm beers? Wine?" I followed up.

"Beer is fine." He shrugged.

I nodded, malakas naman alcohol tolerance ko. Nasanay kasi kay Hashia, pag nabobored kasi siya gusto nya yan, mag inom kaya wala akong choice. Saka nagiging masaya naman ako.

"Uhm I think sa garden na lang tayo?" I said while walking

"Yeah, sure." Tapos nauna na siya sa garden.

May mga stock naman ng beers dito, nung nag grocery sila Manang before we landed to PH. Binilin ko yun, sometimes when I can't sleep I drink beers, when I'm sad I drink beers. 

"You drink a lot in U.S.?" Tanong niya sa'kin ng nakarating ako sa garden.

"I used to go to parties with Hashia." I said, tapos umupo na 'ko sa upuan.

We have a round table beside our swimming pool. Magkaharap ang pwesto namin ni Juan pero mas pinili naming tignan ang buwan.

"Hashia, the one you always tagged in your IG stories." Nagulat ako sa sinabi niya.

"How can you see that? You're blocked in my accounts?!" I exclaimed.

"Ways, Kaela. Ways."He chuckled.

 Okay, naka public naman account ko, so why should I bother asking something like this?

"Fine! Stalker!" Then I teased him tongue's out.

He opened our cans so that we can drink it.

"You know, I missed you a lot." He said, habang ako nakatitig lang sakanya.

"There are times I planned to go to States or train in some school, just to be with you. I used to be with you every single moments of my life but after one moment you lost." Napatinggala siya sa buwan, nag iiwas ng tingin sakin.

I'm speechless. Inaantay ko 'to pero parang hindi ako handa? 

"I sat out for season 83 after you left, because I lost my passion, I'm enduring the pain every second of my life. I don't have you to talk and tell my problems. You caused me so much pain and yet you're still the cure to it." Tinititigan nya ako, namumula ang kanyang mata.

I nodded.

"I caused a lot of pain to you, too. I don't know that Juls has her mental issues way back junior high school. Trauma caused by a trouble, but I was dumbfounded. She's threatening me that she will hurt you once I leave her. Actually, we're not in a relationship that time, I don't have feelings for her but I owe her once, that's why I helped her." He drink his beer.