====
W: Widowmaker but she talks like a surfer dude after shes unbrainwashed
W: “Oh sorry about killing ur mom dude. big mistake wanna go shred some of that fuckin wake”
W: “And I shot her like– kbaam!– cpawsh– and it was just – [weird sound effects]”
====
W: We’re DOOMED
D: Well at least we’ve lived a good life
W: I’M ONLY 18
D: And I’m 15
D: I said good not long
====
R: Okay but why the fuck do you black out when all you pokemon faint?
W: Cause I'm sad
D: Your pokemon can't protect you anymore so the enemy trainer just fucking clocks you
====
D: Anyone who calls me out for saying “like” every other word is not only a misogynist but pressed that i’m like smart as fuck
====
D: No joke I would pay good money to see a live-action “Kim Possible” featuring Zendaya as Kim Possible, Tom Holland as Ron Stoppable, and Jacob Batalon as Wade
W: Nothing has made more sense to me in my entire life
====
W: Eggplants really are just grapes but purpler, larger and different
R: So they're … not eggplants
W: That’s what I’m getting at, yeah
====
D: How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?
D: Konnichihuahua
====
D: Ah, look at the sun, and the wind, and the sky
D: Such a beautiful day, perfect for meeting some old friends, having a little picnic, washing the car, or throwing someone off a 60 story building
W: Dick no!
====
D: Fuck this, I'm out!
W: You've only been here for 5 minutes
D: So?
D: I've seen monkey shit fights at the zoo that were better organized than this fucking family
====
W: Villain: What even are you?!
W: Dick: The living example of what doesn’t kill you gives you a lot of unhealthy coping mechanism, and a sick sense of humor
====
R: Stick and stone may break my bone, but words can never hurt me
W: So, I heard Hamlet died at the end
R: Shut it right there
R: My manly heart is still breaking for it
====
W: And so that's the plan
D: K
W: Well Potassium you too, jerk!
D: What do you want?
D: A periodic table?
====
W: I broke my leg saving some really bad guys but that's what heroes do
W: Kiss me?
D: That's okay, the bad guys are dead now
W: Wait what?
====
D: I think I know a way to get the money
W: You’d make a decent stripper
D: First of all, I’d make an amazing stripper, but that’s not what I’m talking about
====
D: Sometimes I wonder why centipedes chose to evolve a hundred legs
D: Did they not think it was excessive
D: Or
D: Why did they choose to stop at a hundred
D: Why not continue
D: Questions
====
W: Peanut butter was invented purely to taunt me
====
D: Me in jail: so are you guys familiar with the Cell Block Tango?
====
D: Still don't know how to spell spagetti without autocorrect
W: Where's the h
D: An H ????
====
W: What do we do when we're sad?
W: Watch Thor Ragnarok
D: Valid
====
D: I think my favorite fanfic tag I’ve seen is “no editing we die like Jason Todd”
====
R: So you lied to me?
D: That depends on how you define lying
R: I define it as not telling the truth, how do you define it?
D: …Reclining your body… in a… horizontal position
====
D: Are you sure you’re alright?
W: Yeah, i-it’s just these onions
D: …
W: …
D: Those are potatoes, Wally
====
D: My favorite part about Megamind, is that he literally Grew Up on Earth around humans, but is still confused about human culture and etiquette
====
D: Oh I’m shaking in my custom baby seal leather boots!
====
W: It’s warming up
D: The sun is warming up?!
====
W: Can someone stamp my frequent kidnapping card?
D: You of all people know we discontinued that promotion!
====
D: Not now Wally, I’m in a heated existential discussion with this dead-eyed plastic desk toy
====
W: You left us in the hands of....him!
W: No offense
D: No, no, I’m with you
====
W: Without you, evil is running rampant through the streets!
D: I’m so tired of running rampant through the streets
====
D: Real talk, superheroes can be so focused on stupid shit sometimes
D: Arms dealers this, drug dealers that
D: Take down the fucking government already you stupid bitches!!
====
D: Earlier my friend said to me “somewhere out there, in an alternate universe, there’s an all female rock band called ‘king’” and I’m STILL recovering from that mental image and how gay it made me feel
====
D: Hey dude just letting u know for qn 5 u divide by 3 instead of multiply
W: Oh thanks dude :)
W: Wait how did u know that???
D: :))
W: WHERE ARE YOU?!
====
D: Guys, I need to get something off of my chest
W: Is it your shirt?
W: I hope it’s your shirt
====
R: What the fuck is wrong with you?
D: Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
====
W: Hey, do you think I could fit fifteen marshmallows into my mouth?
R: You're a hazard to society
D: And a coward
D: Do twenty
====
D: Its 2020 and people still google "gmail" to access it
W: Fuck you you don’t know my life
====
W: What if your Uber drive threw a flash bang in the backseat
D: That's never happened to you?
W: It has to you?!
====
D: If Cthulhu is supposed to be so incomprehensible, why do some people draw him as a lil bitch with a tentacle beard and a big ass forehead ???
D: I can comprehend that, and its stupid
====
D: Tickling is fun until I get fed up with it (2 seconds in) and then decide to beat the assailant to a pulp
====
D: God I wish there was a wasteland I could banish people to.
====
D: Petition to rename “Americans” to burger idiots
====
YOU ARE READING
Birds of a Feather Flock Together
FanfictionD- Dick W- Wally R- Roy This book is to give a look into the average conversation of teenage superheros and average rich kid problems (Contains birdflash, swearing, major gay, etc.) If you don't like it than what are you even doing here?
