Darkside

Seventeen

"What is this?"

Orson's sitting way too close to the TV, especially for someone watching the news. Particularly this early in the morning.

"What's going on? You're still here? I thought you'd be gone."

He doesn't even look at me, his eyes are too fixed on the screen.

"I'm not going. I'm here to take care of you, Phoenix."

Was there an edge to his voice then? When he said my name, it was different. Maybe I've been accused of paranoia in the past, but this really does seem like something to panic about.

"I...don't need to be taken care of." I perch on the edge of the bed. "I thought I told you that."

"You know, I've just been watching this news story." Uh oh, there's no way this will end well. "About a girl who was killed. Well, they assume she was killed. No one has found a body yet. They always accuse the partner, don't they?"

"Love and hate are very close." Why the hell did I say that? That's a line someone used on Darkside once and I guess it stuck with me. "Lines get blurred."

"Hmm, I suppose motivation and opportunity are easier that way as well." He shrugs just one shoulder. "Passion, deceit, crimes of the heart...I've never understood it though. I never got why anyone would want to hurt the ones they love. Even if they hurt them first."

"Right."

He doesn't know, he can't know.

He wouldn't hurt someone he loves. That makes him...different.

"I've noticed that scar on your arm, Phoenix." Still, he isn't looking my way. His words are much more chilling because of this. "How did you get it? Did someone hurt you? Your father, perhaps? Or a partner?" Silence echoes through the room. "You keep yourself hidden, you remain closed off, and that must be for a reason. I get your silence, you don't want to talk, but if I'm staying here then I need to know."

I don't want him to stay here, isn't that what I've been saying the entire time? So, why not say it again now? He may just need it repeating...

But he finally cocks his head my way, his eyes meet mine, and I drown in his gaze. His beautiful, deep stare that wants to whisk me away from this life and give me something better.

"I've been through things too, Phoenix. My family weren't...great. That's how I ended up at the motel. I needed a job with a room which is why I worked all hours. It's also why it was so easy to leave." There's an angry redness to his cheekbones. "Because I don't ever want to see them again. I get how a person needs to run, to leave something, or someone, behind. That's what you're doing, isn't it?"

I nod.

He's captivated me, unzipped me, caused me to spill a little out.

"You're running away from a father who doesn't care enough about himself, never mind you. I assume that because I live it."

Again, I nod.

"But he isn't the problem." He grabs my arm and lightly drags his finger down my scar. It takes every bit of inner-strength I have not to snatch away. "Someone else came into your life. Promised you the world, sold you a dream, and gave you a nightmare."

I was sold a dream. I did get a nightmare.

"Yes."

That one whispering word from me is scarily loud. Perhaps only in my head.

"He hurt you. Treated you badly. Made you his punching bag. You were too scared to leave, until one day something happened to make you gather up every bit of strength you had. You ran, left him, but had to keep on going. You can't let him find you because if he ever gets to you again, he will make you pay. You'll regret the day you damaged his ego."

This isn't a question, it doesn't need an answer. One sharp nod will be enough.

"I don't know if I have all the details right or just some of them. I don't know if you are really Phoenix or just using that name to remain under the radar. I don't know how far you intend to go, but I do know that if you let me stay I will never do you wrong. I will hide you, protect you, make sure that you never get hurt. I bet a vagrant life is costly, I can help you with that too."

"Why. Why would you do that?"

He shoots me a heart-stopping smile. I melt. I shouldn't puddle but I do.

"Because everyone deserves a chance to rise from the ashes, and because I've never met anyone like you before. I know you came into my life for a reason and I'm not turning my back on that. No matter how many times you yell at me and tell me I'm to go."

Maybe this is love. What I had before wasn't. This stranger, the first person I met as Phoenix, he could be the real deal. If I want to shake off Luvvie once and for all, maybe love is just what I need.