King George x reader - An Uncommon Game - Hamilton

Chapter 56 ~ Not Really Real

12th of May 1782

The warm light leaking in from the lamp glowed. My eyes stared down at the puddles of ink ingrained on the paper. My hand was stained filled and only the loops and curves of letters on the page kept me awake.

Writing is what kept me sane, scribbling every single muddled emotion I had in hopes to vent it out. No one would listen anyway, no one would care. I sighed and picked up the quill and dipped it into the night shaded ink. My hand shook as I carefully pinned it back to the paper.

"Y/N?" my ears pricked ut I ignored the voice and continued writing. "Y/N!" the voice called again. I scoffed and brushed my h/c hair out of my face. I didn't care who it was, at least if I got in trouble something interesting would happen.

"Y/N! Answer me or I'm coming in!" the voice who was clearly now George yelled. I rolled my eyes putting down the quill. "What is it!?" I yelled out.

I waited for a response but was met with silence for a bit. "It's a bit late love don't you want to go to bed?" George asked. I rubbed my temple and scoffed, "No I'm fine, just go to bed without me." I replied and went back to writing. "Y/N what are you doing?" he asked curiously like a little child.

My hand stuttered and I ignored George. "It's just that, you've been avoiding me lately, did I do something?" he questioned. I answered annoyed, "I'm fine, just writing something. You can go now." I replied. The lamp flicked slightly and I yawned.

Suddenly the door opened and George walked towards me. "George I'm really busy can you go aw-" I didn't even get to finish my sentence. Instead he wrapped his arms around me. "Please come to bed Y/N, drowning yourself with paper isn't going to do anything." George whispered.

I removed his arms and continued writing. "Y/N ignoring me isn't going to solve any problems, just please talk to me." he asked concerned. I dropped my quill down and sighed, "I'm fine okay, now leave me alone." I scoffed. George's eyes dimmed and he sighed, "Y/N so was it true, did you really lie when you said you loved me?"

I glared away and mumbled, "Yes." George hugged me again but tighter than before, I looked at his face. His eyes were dimmer than usual and small tears were running down his face. "I'm going to bed, I'll keep the door open for you." he smiled wiping his tears away. I lowered my gaze and turned back to my writing. George walked out of the room and closed the wooden door behind him.

I sighed in relief and continued writing with the dark ink. I didn't feel sorry for him, it was his own fault. I smiled slightly to myself and continued writing. There was no point in feeling guilty anymore.

~George's pov~

I closed the door behind me and felt the tears I was holding in fall down my face, I brushed them away and sprinted towards my room my heart felt sore and only the words Y/N had spoken ratted through my mind. I hated how much she hated me, and I wanted her to love me. And yet she despises me.

Once I reached my bedroom door I opened the door and crashed onto the soft bed. I shoved my face into my pillow and sobbed.

It felt stupid for a 36 year old man to be crying into his pillow and yet I was. All the pain and frustration I had been holding in for the past few weeks was now released.

Even now Y/N was here in the same building as me, I felt further away than I ever had been from her.

She had ignored me and didn't even give me the dignity of telling me anything. But I still loved Y/N, because I knew that if she did love me we could finally be happy, I could finally be happy.

But Y/N didn't want that. And even after I've tried and tried, the future I want is always a step in front of me. All because of me, my cursed self and the cursed crown that sat upon my head.

I wiped away my tears and turned my head, facing where Y/N slept. I smiled and pretended she was there.

Just like I always had.