Out of touch (human reader in splatoon)

8: Squidbeaks are Solid

y/n was travelling through this pipe at a very unsafe speed. He readied his feet for impact.

Stayed ready.

Any time now...

He didn't dare release his stance, because he could very well just die instead of removing the grate.

Just then, he came out the top. The grate had popped off like a bottle cap, and y/n went flying at least 15 feet in the air. Within this time, he managed to flip himself around and land almost perfectly in front of the grate. y/n then looked up, to see Marie again.

y/n: "Insert action movie one liner here."

Instead of a normal response, Marie just slapped him across the face. Hard.

y/n: "I deserve that. About half of that."

Marie: "Oh no, you deserve it all. I waited here ALL. DAY. You know no-"

y/n: "I'm sorry, I didn't think it was that urgent..."

Marie: "Oh, sure. Well, the good thing is, is that you're here. Sorry for getting mad at you like that."

y/n: "I deserved it."

Marie: "I never thought men could clothe shop like that."

y/n: "It was a historical experience for both of us."

Marie: "What do you mean?"

She looked down at his suit, and got a little quieter.

y/n looked around. He was on a floating island somehow. Him being afraid of heights, he sat down and tried to get closer to the center of the small land mass they were on.

Then Nate appeared.

Nate: "n/n, what's going on here?"

y/n: "Me too."

Marie: "Ok, will both of you shut up and listen?"

y/n and Nate turned towards Marie.

Marie: "Ok... Nate. I'm Marie. I know you're probably a bit starstruck, but I need you to get over it."

Nate was just visibly confused.

Marie: "Yes, I'm THAT Marie. You know... from the Squid Sisters."

Nate kept staring in silence.

Marie: "You've never heard of me? For eel?"

y/n sighed hardly.

Marie: "Well, you obviously aren't very cultured, but you and n/n over here will have to do."

y/n: "I get a free pass because I was in cryogenic hibernation for 12,000 years."

Marie: "So you forgot?"

y/n: "No... I didn't care for modern celebrities ever. Except now."

Marie: "What do you mean, you cared about the older ones?"

y/n: "You know David Bowie? Bad example, i forgot about the whole 12,000 extra years. What were you doing, Nate? You might know her."

Nate: "... I prefer old celebrities, like n/n..."

Marie: "Anyway, back to the point. See, I've got a little... thing I need help with. By now you've heard that the Great Zapfish that powers Inkopolis square is missing. Well, it's not just missing - it's been squidnapped by the Octarian menace! How do I know this? On the surface, I may just look like an absurdly talented popstar..."

y/n: (you wish).

Marie: "Hey!"

She heard him whisper, and tapped him on the head with the umbrella she was holding.