And he loved her (Phantom of the Opera Fanfiction)

Chapter 5

"I can't ever let you go." That was what he said, before he rose up and left the room.

And I lay there alone, my thoughts whirring and stirring. My heart was racing, and it took me a few moments to calm my heartbeat. But it thumped as loud as ever before. What was that?

Usually when he had said such words, I couldn't feel his emotion and the weight of his words. But this time I saw it. His heart. It was sincere and pure for that moment.

And my reaction. My heart had swell up so much. My mind was now in a haze. Usually I would have been unaffected by his words, but now my head was a blur. But maybe what I needed was sleep. Yes, that must be it. I closed my eyes, readily welcoming darkness to sweep into my eyes. But instead of darkness, there was an image of Eric formed in my mind.

Suddenly I could not sleep no matter how much I wanted to. He was there, flashing in my thoughts, and I desperately tried to sleep, but to no avail. I just kept thinking about him. What's happening? Why am I like this? Every time I closed my eyes, Eric would appear before me. And suddenly I have this urge to see him, just for no apparent reason.

Perhaps you're in love with him? A voice whispered in my mind. No, no. This can't be. I have hated Eric so much just a few days before for all the things he had done to me- he had kidnapped me, forced me into a marriage, and then locked me into my room for weeks.

But where was the hate for him now? No matter how hard I tried to grasp back my hate for him, I could feel that it all had all disappeared. I couldn't bring myself to hate him anymore. Even the fear I had for him had vanished completely.

Then, as I started thinking about Eric, my mind drifted off about the clothes he wore, his walking style and even his facial features. Absurdly I was agreeing he had looked so extremely handsome in all his black clothes. But the mask was rather puzzling. Why did he wear a mask? Was it for style, or perhaps to just look different? Anyways, in my head I had actually thought Eric had looked cute, being so stylish and also of his feline walk.

Christine, Christine! Get a grip on your own self! I let my voice echo in my mind. Later on, when I do managed to sleep, it was only for an hour before I could not sleep again. And even in my dreams, I had thought about Eric. Just like this, I had spent the whole night awake with only an hour of sleep, completely having Eric in my mind.

The clouds and the sky were dark and shifting first, but slowly they lit up brighter, and then the sun came up and flashed its brilliant light to the whole room. Great, I thought. I had been awake almost the whole night just thinking about Eric. It was now morning, and dark eye circles had formed around my eyes. And when the servants came in to serve me a tray of breakfast, I had no appetite, and left the meal untouched. Later on, when it was afternoon, another maid had come in with lunch, but once again I didn't feel like eating. My head was swarming dizzily about Eric.

Later on, when it had grew dark and evening had arrived, there were knocks on the door. It was dinner to be served, I supposed. But instead of a servant coming in with the tray of dinner, it was an unmistakable tall masked man walking into my bedroom. Eric. I immediately diverted my gaze at his legs, for no reason why I was scared to look into his eyes. Yes, Eric had looked a little angry, but I could see there was more worry and concern in his gaze. Suddenly I had been scared to lock gazes with him, but even when he was most angry I had usually still peered into his eyes. This was very weird. And even so now, my heart had thumped so rapidly too. I never thought Eric would visit me in my room, especially not today! Isn't he busy with work or something?

"Erm, you can leave dinner there. I'll eat it later." I turned around with my back facing Eric.

"No. I will stay here until you eat," He said, as he sat on a chair. "The servants had said that in the morning you had looked disastrous, almost as if you lacked sleep. And then they told me about you skipping your meals. I will be here until you finish every grain of rice."

"Okay then." Hurriedly I took the tray of food, and ate at the far corner of my room away from Eric. I faced the wall, for I really did not want to look at Eric. My heart almost felt like it could explode and shatter, for I could feel my heartbeat was racing. Eric was here! Eric was here! I certainly could not let him find out that I had started to love him. And for all I know, he was one of the smartest men in the world. But still I had to keep this a secret. There was a moment of silence, as I sat gulping my food. Then when I had finished, I went to pass the tray back to Eric, but my eyes were still looking away from him.

"There, I've eaten. You can go now." I quickly turned away from him, but I felt his hand grabbed mine. Suddenly I felt my spine electrifying in thrill. What was this feeling?

"Christine." He said. "You're acting weird." I froze. Oh nuts. He might've found out.

"No I'm fine really. I'm just being normal," I mumble back under my breath.

"You've been avoiding my gaze, trying desperately to get me out of the room, and you don't mumble. And when I asked you to do something, you have never agreed to do so obediently like how you did when I told you to eat your dinner." He took a step forward at me. I quickly moved back in response.

"I'm okay, it's just your imagination! Well, you better go now…" Eric had started to move forward towards me. I quickly took steps back in response, until my back had touched the wall. And there was that incoming Eric. I turned to look away, but he tilted my chin up so that I would meet his eyes. His beautiful amber eyes. Wait- what was I even thinking? Eric's gaze had pierced through me. No, no, no. If this still continued, he would definitely find out. Find out that I had started to love him. With my heart slamming against my ribs like a jackhammer, I scrambled my brain for thoughts. For any way I could use to get out of this situation, and keep my secret safe with me. But Eric had pushed me back against the wall, and there was no hope that I could move his arm away and run out of the door or something like that. The room was locked.

Suddenly a thought struck me. In such desperation to keep my secret away, without thought I brought his cheek down and crushed my lips against his. Eric's voice faltered away, and I could feel his gaze of shock. His lips brushed against mine, and I could feel Eric's burning desire to make the kiss even longer. Quickly I pulled myself back away from him, dived for my bed and went under the covers.

"Erm, goodnight." my muffled voice said.

"...Yes, nights." He had said. I could hear the shock and fluster in his voice.

And with that the door slammed shut.

I sat back on my bed. This was definitely disastrous. I had just kissed Eric! No doubt he would have known about my secret. Just what was I thinking? And even during that kiss. I actually enjoyed it.

Oh no, my world was definitely a mess now...