- love lockdown

thirty four

jeongguk pov

i leaned back on the wall waiting for jimin. his class are ending soon. i held my tears back.

'i can't leave jimin like this, but i have to.'

the pupil starts fixing their things as jimin happily skipped and hugs me.

i hugged back tightly while smelling his scent.

'i'll miss this vanilla scent.' i thought while licking his neck that made him mewl.

"y-yah ggukie w-what are you doing?" jimin asked fixing his glasses and i shook my head

"nothing cupcake let's go?" i asked while intertwining our hands, jimin nods and leans his head on my shoulder.

'how should i say this, jimin doesn't deserve any of this.'

"ggukie are you okay?" jimin asked looking worriedly at me and i took a deep breath.

i stopped walking as he does the same. "jimin we have to stop this." i addressed while looking down, not wanting to see jimin's expression or reaction.

"w-what are you talking about?" he asked, voice cracking in process. it broke my heart.

'sorry cupcake.'

"w-we can't do this anymore jimin, you know what i mean." i tried so hard not to let my tears escaped from my eyes.

i look up to see him tearing up, hands on his mouth preventing any sound from coming.

"w-what g-ggukie y-you can't d-do this o-on me." jimin stuttered while fiddling his fingers, i just want to wipe those tears and hug him, but i know i can't.

"jimin, i'm sorry..." i whispered, feeling my heart clenching. i pulled him into my chest and rub soft circles in his back.

'baby please stop crying, i wouldn't leave if you continue crying.'

"jimin..." i kiss the crown of his head but he keeps sobbing and didn't reply.

"i-i wish you didn't came into my life, b-because it hurts ggukie." he look up with teary eyes, eyes glistening with tears. fat tears making their way to jimin's cheeks.

i wipe them off and choked a sob, letting my tears fall one by one.

"don't cry." i mumbled, he shook his head and smile a little.

"i'm not worth of your tears." he pushed me a little before smiling sadly at me. my grip on his waist loosen, he wipe his tears off. i held his hands and brought them to my lips.

kissing it lightly, he wipe off my tears and lean closer until our faces we're inches away from each other. i wrap my arms around his waist again.

our nose touch, and our lips met. it was a bitter sweet kiss, all the sadness and sorrow we poured into that kiss. jimin pulled away and unwrap my arms around his waist.

'if only i can jimin...'

"you're...worth it of my tears gguk-ah. " he wave his hands before walking away, i touch my lips and sobbed lightly.

"i-i love you." i whispered, i feel my knees giving up. heart clenching, i leaned on the wall for support.

i thought it'll be so easy.

fuck.

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