Just Close Enough to Burn (station 19)

Weather the Storm

Dear Diary,

I had my intro to clinical exam yesterday so I was glad that I didn't have a shift scheduled. But of course I got called in to help since there were so many extra emergencies due to the storm. I got the call just before my exam and immediately called Sullivan to let him know I would be late. I can't say I'm surprised we got called in; this storm was crazy. The wind was so bad that it was pushing cars around and breaking windows, truly one of the worst storms I've ever seen. I took my exam as quickly as I possibly could so I could get to the station before the storm got too bad to drive. Hopefully I did okay.

Anyway, by the time I got to the station, the aid car was already out on a call. Sullivan joined Andy since I was coming in late. The squad had planned on doing a friendsgiving at Dean's houseboat but it got canceled when we got called in, so Pruitt, Ryan, Mr. Tanner, and Grant decided to bring friendsgiving to the station. Pruitt asked me how school was going and I told him that it was going well. I've made some friends and am really enjoying all of my classes. Being the dad figure he is, he immediately asked about my grades. I laughed and told him I was still maintaining my 4.0 GPA. If I didn't lose my streak of A's in high school or undergrad, I sure as hell wasn't going to lose it now. He chuckled and said he expected nothing less.

Later on, I was helping Ben stock the trucks when Vic came over to ask about Jack. We had all started to notice that he seemed off and really on edge lately. And Ripley assigning him to stay back at the station and hold down the fort when the rest of the team got called out didn't help matters much. There wasn't much I could do until Andy and Sullivan made it back with the aid car, so I trailed Jack and tried to help where I could and also tried to keep an eye on him. Finally the guys decided to play a game of poker while they waited for any news and for the rest of the team to get back. Mr. Tanner assumed I wasn't playing but Herrera backed me up. He told Greg that he had taught me how to play poker as a kid and I wasn't half bad, as he dealt me in. I laughed and picked up my hand, ready to kick Mr. Tanner's ass. I did by the way. I ended up with twice as many marshmallows as any of the guys at the table.

We finally got a call from Ripley that all of SFD was grounded and was to return to their stations immediately and stay there until further notice. I waited, not so patiently, for the team. The engine and ladder crews made it back within a few minutes, but there was still no sign of the aid car. We all headed up to the beanery to continue with friendsgiving. Grant did an incredible job with the food, everything smelled delicious and tasted even better. Over dinner, Ripley announced that Maya had made lieutenant! We were all sooooo excited for her, until he said that she'd be transferring to station 23. She tried to call Andy to let her know but couldn't get a hold of her. As excited as she was I could tell she was freaked at the idea of leaving 19. And to be fair I was too. Since she couldn't get in touch with Andy, I pulled her aside and asked how she was feeling about all the news, but she said she didn't want to talk about it yet.

After a while I started to get nervous that no one had heard from Andy or Sullivan. I tried to keep busy to distract myself from thinking of the worst. We were all cleaning up when Herrera yelled at all of us. He called us out for not saying anything about how weird Gibson has been. It felt like getting in trouble with your parents, and what made it worse was that he didn't even seem that mad, just disappointed. Dean went to get Jack while the rest of us waited for him at the table. It was a sort of intervention. We explained that we were worried about him and he lashed out at every one of us. Before we could really get through to Jack, Ripley burst in to say that we got communication back and that the aid car never made it to the hospital. Our first priority was a search and rescue for Sullivan and Herrera. I'm technically not supposed to go on any calls that aren't with the aid car but I ran to the engine anyway. I was going to beg Ripley to let me go with them, but he put Pruitt in charge, so I didn't even have to ask, I just hopped into the engine with a jump bag.

Maya looked back at me as I got in. Without speaking we both knew the other was worried about Andy. I tried to reassure both of us by saying that it was Andy, she'd be fine, she had to be. As much as I wanted to believe it, I was really scared. Maya was driving as fast as she possibly could so I knew she was still scared too. Finally we saw a flare on the road and pulled over. The aid car had tumbled down a really steep ravine and looked badly damaged. My heart jumped into my throat as I fought back tears. It looked just like what happened to my dad: rolling down a ravine and landing on the driver's side killed him.

Andy and Sullivan were miraculously alive and I hugged Andy so hard I almost broke her. We got them to the hospital where they were both admitted for observation. Andy will probably be released tomorrow, but Sullivan is going to need more care. He had partial paralysis of his legs and we're not sure yet if it's reversible. I'm hopeful that Amelia will be able to get him full function back, but only time will tell.

Maya and I drove home together and I asked again if she wanted to talk. She still seemed rattled from everything that happened. Again, she brushed it off, said she was fine, and didn't want to talk about it. I abided and went right to bed when we got home. A few hours later I heard my door creak open and looked up to see Maya standing in the doorway.

"It's 2 am, what are you doing?" Mattie asked groggily as she rolled away from the light seeping in from the hall.

Maya sat down on Mattie's bed and quietly said, "I'm ready to talk now."

"Seriously? I ask you all day if you need to talk and you decide that now is a good time? I'll talk to you in the morning; I'm sleeping," Mattie grumbled as she buried her head deeper into her pillow. She paused as she heard the shakiness in Maya's breath and rolled over. She saw tears falling down her face.

"Hey, wait, no, I'm sorry. We can talk now." Mattie apologized as she sat up and pulled Maya into a hug. Safely in her friend's arms Maya completely broke down, the weight of the whole day finally hitting her. Mattie pulled her in tighter, resting her head on top of Maya's.

"Shhh, it's okay. I've got you," Mattie whispered until Maya started to calm down, "Everything's going to be okay."

Maya and I sat up and talked until 3:30. We talked about everything from how stressful and scary the situation with Andy was, to how helpless we feel in not being able to do anything for Jack, and finally how worried she is about transferring stations. Eventually we both fell asleep; Maya just stayed in my bed for the rest of the night but I didn't really mind.  We didn't mention any of it when we woke up this morning, but Maya seemed to be doing better so I just made coffee as we chatted about the newest episode of our favorite podcast.

-Mattie