Finding A Home Amongst The Wolves

When truths come out

~Snow~

~Skip past the whole mall scene~

"Blake will you just calm the fuck down? We were perfectly safe out there. We had Xena with us and she took care of everything."

He snarls and I know he's on the verge of having shadow come out, that's how furious he is with all of us. His hold on my hand grows tighter as he practically throws us the rest of the way into his room, slamming the door behind him and shoving me up against it with his arms caging me in.

"Do you know how furious I am at you? How stupid what you all did today was? Especially you."

"I can get you being angry but don't you dare call me stupid Blake! Do you know who the hell we are? We're not fucking stupid, if you think for one second that not a single one of us thought what we were doing through then you highly underestimated us. And why is it 'especially' me?"

I watch as his eyes flash in his angry rage, I think he forgot who he was talking to. He scoffs and turns away from me, running his hands through his hair before looking back at me.

"Did you think that whoever is out there doing this can't also kill you? What makes you think you're all so powerful and the exception? You know why you, 'especially,' was a bad idea. As the Luna of the pack you need to put this pack first and to show me and this pack that you have common sense when it comes to this. How can I trust and rely on you as my Luna when you go running off at a time like this? Sometimes I don't think I can trust you in the Luna position."

I blink up at my mate as he stands across the room from me and says those hurtful words. At this point the door behind me is both for moral and physical support as the words he spouted just knocked the strength from me, he took the air right from my lungs.

I feel Crystal come to the surface and push strength into my body, she doesn't like the aspect of any man seeing us weak. No man will see us weak and no man will be the cause, especially if that man is supposed to be our mate. With a push from Crystal I stand up on my own, I blink away my tears and resolve comes back into my body. I know the exact moment that he realizes that he fucked up because he tries to walk back over to me with some lame as excuse about how he didn't mean it.

No!

Putting my hand up in the stop position he stops in his tracks to me and I shake my head.

"Like I said earlier this morning Xena and I have done everything for this pack and I don't need you or anyone else to say different to know I'm right. I know what I'm doing and if I did anything it would never be to put this pack in danger but thank you for finally speaking the truth. You have never wanted me as a mate and if it wasn't for this mating pull I know you would have sent me packing a while ago. Don't worry though as soon as all this is over I'll be out of here, I don't want to be where I'm not wanted and I know I'm not. If I was, you would've treated me like your mate and Luna from the beginning."

He starts to make his way towards me again but I've already made up my mind.

See the difference between lions and wolves is we're not dependent on the mating pull like them. We can choose to ignore it if we want and right now I'm going to make my choice.

"I don't want to hear your fake apologies Blake. You've made your decisions and I've made mine. Right after this is said and done you won't have to worry about me. From this day forward I am no longer your mate. I will be living elsewhere from now on. Since you don't want me for a mate I'll give you full permission to choose a more worthy female and as soon as that's done I will get this damn mark taken off me. Good day Blake, I hope you find everything you're looking for."

With that I turn and walk out of the room, leaving my heart and the possible future behind me.

Shutting the door behind me on one chapter of my life I feel a single tear slide down my face. Wiping it from my eyes I go to Xena's room and knock softly. She opens after the second knock and upon seeing my face pulls me into a hug.

"Come, the girls are already here."

Walking into the room I saw all the girls I had just spent the day with sprawled out on the bed. Ushering me inside, I climb onto the bed with the rest of the three women who have quickly become my best friends. It wasn't until I had finished crying in their arms that I realized how much I missed out on this growing up and also how much I wished my brothers were here with me.

Not to worry though, I'll soon be living with them in the Pride's lands soon.

I told them what happened and what was said and it took all of us to hold Xena down in her rage.

"I'm going to fucking kill him! How fucking dare he, he just lost the best thing that's ever happened to him! Stupid fucking mutt!"

We all look at her in flabbergasted wonder as she goes off. It's not a secret that she loves any breed of canine, so this coming from her is something else.

She looks over at me mid rant and it's like a switch flips cause a thought dawns on her.

"What are you going to do Snow? Where are you going to go? I'll go wherever you go so just tell me and watch as I drop everything and everyone to go. Right girls?"

She looks over at the others and they all nod their heads eagerly.

Danny looks close to shifting now and tearing something out and Serenity is trying to claw her hand off of hers. I guess in her anger she forgot she was previously painting Serenity's nails.

Although I highly doubt they look good anymore.

"I'll give Joey one chance cause I'm not going to stay in a pack or loyal to a pack that it's leader treats his so called mate like this! He can come home with me or we go our separate ways. My loyalty lies with my family!"

Prying the rest of her fingers off for Serenity, I rub her hand in apology while patting Danny's hand in comfort.

"No girls, it's really okay. I'm going to follow this through and then go home to live with my brother's. I don't want you to give them up for me, Xavier and Joey haven't done anything to warrant their mates leaving them."

It took a little while but I finally got them to drop it and for the rest of the time we spent watching a movie and all together having a great girls night.

That night we all slept together on one bed and I'm surprised we actually all fit.

Blake hurt me this night but that's fine. I've had the time to shatter and tomorrow morning I'll pick up the pieces and keep on walking because I can't expect someone else to take care of me for me.

Tomorrow I'll deal with what's left of my shattered heart. Tonight I just want to take comfort from my friends.