Heartsick || An Izuku and Ochako story

New thoughts

Izuku was nervous. Again.

He hated himself for being so worried. His feelings had been revealed, Ochako had accepted them, and all was good. There had been a good enough amount of embarrassment to last them a lifetime, but that should've been over by now. The unnecessary blushing, the stuttering, all of it.

But Izuku knew that was a stupid thought. Confessing was merely one large step on a staircase to success, and he, being as awkward and unexperienced around girls due to his middle school years, took much longer than the average person to climb that one step. Ochako wasn't as experienced either, but she did a much better job hiding it than him.

That same morning, the two had popped a few other key questions, including whether or not they would tell Iida about their relationship.

Ochako didn't look too eager about that, and neither did Izuku. "I don't know...we just started. Shouldn't we wait until we can sort ourselves out? Until we're used to dating?"

She had an uneasy tone to her voice, and it was very obvious that that wasn't the reason she didn't want to tell him. Izuku himself had a lingering suspicion that Iida might not approve of their relationship. Of course, he was their friend, and friends support friends. Iida, however, was very high-strung with school-related matters and would probably assume that their dating might distract from that.

Ochako seemed to be thinking along the same lines and frowned. She had a guilty look on her face, and he couldn't blame her. Iida was a good companion of theirs and lying to him didn't sit well with them.  Lying to him felt wrong, but the possible consequences of telling him could be worse. They'd tell him when they were sure he wouldn't mind, and when they themselves were more prepared.

The two had also decided that they couldn't tell the class. For one, they both knew the amount of teasing they'd get would be unbearable and were definitely not ready for that. Izuku also took into account how fast word of their relationship would get around school, with Mina's non-stop gossiping.  

Ochako had also proposed another rule between the two, one that Izuku regretted agreeing to. She'd stated that neither of them had to worry about dates or any of the such, since hero work was tough and they didn't need the extra stress. She'd explained that as long as she could spend time with her boyfriend, nothing else had to be done.

Boyfriend. Being referred to as that was a new and weird sensation. Even their current relationship felt unreal. Izuku still didn't know how he'd gotten so lucky, winning the heart of a girl like Ochako.

He let out a sigh and leaned against his pillow, gazing out at the bedsheets. Everything in his room was covered in a dark orange wash of color as the sun dipped below the horizon. A few pencils, erasers and a notebook were scattered next to him. Time ticked by ever so slowly until a quiet knock was heard at his door.

He tried to stomp down his enthusiasm as he wrapped his hands over the knob and opened the door. Ochako's smile greeted him.

It was winter, but the frisk breeze that flew through the dorm halls didn't seem to bother her. Shorts grazed at her thighs and ended there, but she did adorn a long-sleeved shirt. Her usually smooth hair was pressed up into a bun, with a few strands falling out. She held her books tightly against her chest, papers hinting what she needed help on.

Izuku smiled and opened the door, beckoning her in, but Ochako just stood there. Her eyes were wide with unmistakable awe, and they darted and savored every single piece of All Might merchandise that was in the room.

"Wow, Izuku!" she complimented, although he felt more embarrassed rather than accomplished. "You have so much All Might stuff!"

Ever since the class had scoured each other's dorms, Izuku had decided that maybe it would be time to get rid of a few All Might objects. The bed had to stay, and so did the limited edition figures. No way would he throw out those cards, Kacchan would boast for ages about how he tossed such a priceless thing out...

In the end, Izuku decided on his All Might boxers.

Ochako pranced around, meticulously eying each action figure and subjecting every accessory to her scrutinizing but adorable gaze until eventually collapsing onto his hero-themed bedsheets. Her fingers stroked the soft covers before he spoke up. 

"S-so," he flinched at the stutter, "what did you want to study?"

Now it was her turn to look embarrassed. "Actually, I don't really have anything to, um, study."

Izuku looked over at her books, puzzled until he saw that she hadn't brought any writing utensils. She winced the minute his face betrayed the discovery he'd made.

Ochako blushed and looked down at her crossed legs. They were milky white, not a speck on them besides faded scars that she must have gotten from training. Even then, they looked soft to the touch. Izuku had the strangest urge to reach over and squeeze one, just for the fun of it.

His face roared to life and it took all of his willpower not to brutally slap himself in front of her. What was he thinking? For a minute, his mindset had been that of Mineta's and he was definitely not proud of it. A similar urge had come over him at the USJ, but he'd been interrupted then. 

Yet again, Izuku's mind thought against his usual ideals and his hand, slowly but surely, inched forward. Ochako was gazing up, trying to fight through her embarrassment, and didn't notice. 

'What am I doing?' he internally screamed. This wasn't right- he was harassing her by doing this, boyfriend or not. He didn't want to harm Ochko in any way, so it would be best to stop.

But those were just thoughts, not actions. His hands finally touched down on her skin, which was soft as freshly picked and combed cotton. His hands were in a pinching position, but his touch didn't hurt. It was light and gentle, and he squeezed. Her thigh felt like it was filled with water, yet it was so toned and firm that he highly doubted that analogy.

Ochako certainly noticed what he was doing now, and gazed up at him, her eyes wide. She didn't say anything, even when his hand didn't leave her legs.

Eventually, Izuku came to his senses and quickly yanked his hands away from her. His mouth sputtered out thousands upon thousands of apologies, one after the other. 

"I'm so, so sorry Ura-Ochako!" he yelped, and at that moment, he didn't even feel like he deserved to call her by her first name. Someone she really trusted deserved that privilege, not him.

He continued to apologize, and yet Ochako still didn't utter a word. Her eyes were softly grazing over the scars on his hands, and her own fingers inched towards them.

Izuku noticed her sudden movement and he felt the blood in his veins stop. She was so close, and leaning even closer. Her vanilla scent calmed him down,  and the occasional brushing of her hair against his cheek. He almost didn't notice when she finally placed her soft fingers on his scars, tracing the thin lines that went across his knuckles. 

He had to admit that her touch felt good. She caressed and gingerly touched every jagged line on his skin like she was a healer of sorts, determined to let the scars melt into him and never return.

And they remained like that, wrapped up in the shadows of the ascending night, within one another arms. Ochako's arms were still touching his, but in that short, rare moment, Izuku didn't care. He didn't care at all.

                                  .                                                .                                                           .

Oh lord, what have I written?

Sue me.