Emison: Home

Chapter 28: The Five Stages of Grief

Spencer's POV

I'm sitting at the kitchen counter having my cup of coffee listening to Hanna, Ali and Cece talking about the latest fashion trends. Em had gone for a last minute dip despite the cold and the guys were packing up the cars getting ready to go home. Aria and I had yet to speak. Truthfully, I didn't particularly feel like approaching her and asking her about it. For all I know, she doesn't want to try. And at least if she says nothing, I can pretend and hold on to some hope, although we all know where that leads.

"Hello Earth to Spencer" Hanna waves a hand in front of me

"Huh?"

"I asked you if you had any sweets or something lying around - this baby mama has a mad sweet tooth right now!"

"Sure it's the pregnancy that does that" I laugh as I get down from the counter and walk to the snacks cabinet "Here" I throw a pack of sweets her way

"Thanks"

"Spencer - we didn't really get into it last night, but this thing with Aria?" Ali asks

"What about it?" I gulp

"Well what is it?" Cece adds

I stare at them completely unsure of how to answer "Ummm"

"Actually, Spencer I was hoping you and I could take a walk and talk about this together?" I turn to the kitchen entrance to find Aria standing there visibly nervous

"Um sure, yes, yeah" I stammer. I let her lead the way outside. We just walk in silence for a couple minutes by the lake. God I hate silence. I really would rather she just ripped the band-aid off. It's been six years since we kissed in my barn during a game of truth or dare with the girls, 3 months since we slept together. Surely, she must have some clue by now about whether or not she wants to pursue this. Maybe she's not saying anything because she doesn't want to hurt me. Oh god. Maybe she doesn't want to have anything to do with me at all any more. Ah shit.

"Look Aria, please don't say this has ruined our friendship. We can just pretend nothing ever happened - not a problem. We never slept together, I never told you I liked you everything is all good and -"

"Spencer" she puts a hand on my arm and stands herself in front of me "Breathe" I nod and take a deep breath "I've thought about it. And what happened, happened. And it didn't for no reason. And I'm still not sure about the reason and about what this means" she gestures between us "But there's no denying this is clearly something worth exploring"

I look at her beaming "Wait so?"

She lets out a light chuckle and smiles up to me "It means I want to try this. But no labels for now. I want us to go on dates and figure this all out. For now, it's the best I can do. I hope that's enough"

"It is. It really is" I grab her into a hug and kiss her temple. I feel her arms wrap themselves around my waist and I slowly comfortably sink in to the feeling of her small frame against mine.

Alison's POV

"That was a really nice weekend" I sigh happily as I rest my head on Em's shoulder. We were pulling up outside my house, Noel and Cece had driven us back.

"It was a great weekend" Em kisses the top of my head

"Ugh are we going to have to put up with you two being overly sweet again?" Noel rolls his eyes

"Considering I have five years of bad behaviour to make up for - abso-fucking-lutely yes!" Em answers getting out the car and running to open the door for me