"Aha! So you are soft! I knew it!" You poked him in the middle of the shell.
"What-no! That's not what I meant-"
"You act like you're this macho tough guy, but really you're just a soft teddy bear," you teased, booping him on the nose.
"Shut up," Ra...
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Raph didn't really talk to anyone after Mona left. When he took his eyes off of the sky, he focused them on the ground, and more or less kept them there on the way back to the lair. He brushed off Leo's fatherly concern, Mikey's curious questions, Donnie's awkward attempts at comfort, and [F/N]'s hesitant invitation to talk. They didn't talk to him that much, but it was still more than he really wanted to deal with.
"I'm fine," he told them, and then he told them again, and again. "I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine."
He didn't even get mad at them when they kept asking, which he knew worried them even more, but he didn't have the energy to be angry at them, and he didn't have the energy to convince them he was fine, either.
They made it back to the lair, unusually quiet. Raph was glad they had already eaten dinner. He wasn't sure he would have been able to sit through it if they'd had it after Mona left.
His head hurt, and maybe his heart. He just wanted to go to his room and lie down.
"Hey, uh, Raph?" [F/N]'s voice sounded from behind him, quiet and uncertain.
"What is it?" He didn't have the strength to make his voice sound anything but tired.
"...is it alright with you if I move back into Mona's room?"
Raph shrugged, not turning around to meet [F/N]'s gaze. "It's not my room. Do what you want."
He left [F/N] standing there, probably more concerned about him than ever, but he just couldn't bring himself to care at the moment. His heart was numb, and he was so tired.
Raph entered into his room, closing the door and locking it. He went over to his bed, and flopped onto his back, using his hands to prop his head up. Chompy wandered over to him and nuzzled him.
"Hey, buddy." He patted the little space turtle. Chompy nudged him and lay down next to his head.
Raph stared up at the ceiling, trying to make his mind go blank to process the pain, and not quite succeeding. He allowed his eyes to drift shut, trying to let his mind drift as well, but inevitably, it ended up drifting towards Mona. The time they first met, their first kiss, their awkward (but wonderful) first date, a thousand more dates, laying here on the bed with her and talking, their love emails—everything. She'd been as much of a part of his life as he could make her, and he'd done his best to make her part of everything.
His mind drifted to the final moments, the less happy moments—to the sadness in her eyes as they parted, their arguments, and their mutual agreement to break up.
* * * * *
Raph remembered the first time they'd met. He'd been starry-eyed, impressed by a pretty girl who could kick his shell. Okay, so admittedly, his standards had been pretty low, but he'd almost never even seen anyone who wasn't related to him for 15 years. Opportunities for dating were pretty rare, with their upbringing. After all, it wasn't like there were a lot of single, attractive teens wandering the sewers, looking to date a teenage mutant turtle. Sure, Mona was an alien, and a salamander-like one at that, but he was a turtle-y humanish monstrosity, so he could care less.
