Beautiful, Dirty, Rich (Monsta X Fanfiction)

Chapter Fifty Nine: Let's Talk

Wonho and I arrived home. He sat down on the couch, and I followed after him. I took a seat on the ottoman across from him, my gaze trained on his face. Both of us sat sort of hunched-over, our body languge reflecting the severity of the situation. Wonho hung his head, elbows on his thighs, his hands clasped in front of him. I didn't want to press him, letting him be the first to speak.

 His serious silence was followed by a serious, but dejected tone.

"So, I wasn't the best citizen for a little while," He confessed, "It's not nearly as bad as Changkyun made it seem, though."

"Did you sell drugs?" I asked.

"No," He laughed bitterly, shaking his head, "I used for a while, but that was it. I stopped after a couple of months."

I stared at him blankly, taking all of this information in. I was curious what drugs he may have dabbled in, but decided it wasn't necessary to ask. All that mattered was that he stopped.

"I'm not a good guy, I know that," he continued, "I can't say you're the first girl I've been with, you're not. I'm not innocent or pure, I'm not anything like that." 

"Just because you used to be a trouble maker, doesn't mean you are a bad person," I tried to comfort him. I reached out to touch his tense hands, hoping I could provide some warmth, "Although, your conniving-ness isn't the best quality of yours, you're still a good guy."

"Thanks," he was clearly unconvinced. 

"What about Wonho Jr.?" I finally asked, wincing as the words came out of my mouth. After seeing the picture of that baby, I worried about what it would do to his reputation, and to our relationship, "Is he... yours?"

Wonho shook his head lightly, and I let out the most relieved sigh ever.

"Changkyun convinced Jieun that her kid was mine, but it isn't," he muttered, "It was a possibility, but the paternity test was negative."

'So he went and got a paternity test while I was gone?'

It was the responsible thing to do. But it made me wonder what else he did while I was gone. What other problems did he have to resolve alone, in the shadows? 

I wondered what it was like in Wonho's head when he thought he had a child. How did he react to finally see a sexual conquest after so long, after he changed? It sort of haunted me, but it was best not to think about it.

"I've changed my life around so much. I'm not a criminal. I haven't had any more one-night stands. I'm set on being a good man, and a good husband. I hoped you'd never figure out about any of this, because I hate to even think about it."

Wonho's brow knit. After bottling up all of his secrets and emotions, it was clearly hard to him to let it out.

"Well, it isn't that bad," I tried to make him laugh to lighten the mood (even thought all of this was still very extreme for me), "You haven't murdered anyone."

He smiled a little, but I could tell it was forced.

"How many girls do you think..." I started to ask, but stopped.

Honestly, I didn't want to know. Having the knowledge that Wonho was a raging hoe was already overwhelming enough, I didn't want to know how many girls he slept with.

But, according to Minji and Eunkyung, he was amazing. 

I shook the thought away though.

Wonho was beating himself up a lot about his past. I hadn't realized how much he hated this side of himself. Now I understood why he didn't talk about it. Still, it was best that I knew the truth. Now I know exactly who I'm marrying.