If I have committed a sin by loving the stars more than their creater then I have sinned indeed
I am but a human being
Following through the crooked and cracked roads of this thing called life
Unsure about anything in particular
Failing at everything and anything I put my hands on
Feeling desire, misery, passion, hate, love and most of all fear
And still getting back up to try again, because I am but a visitor in this life
Just watching the events of every moment fall into place and create memories that stay as the life of a soul that once lived
I don't know where am headed but I know am going somewhere
It's a bit weird but I can tell you this,
I have never been more excited about anything in this life than this moment right here
A moment of self reflection
A moment of self actualization and direction
I now know I have somewhere I have to go
A destination only revealed to my creator
And somehow the coordinates of its direction are engraved into my DNA so that at every waking moment of my life I feel the pressure to Pursue them like it's destiny
I Chase the wind with high notes and a starved mind
I am but a piece of a puzzle inside my mind
I arrange the dominos to every moment that ever meant something to me in a labyrinth pattern
Then I blow a kiss in their direction
And down they go
Tumbling and falling onto each other in a synchronised manner
Playing out like a theater tape on repeat
I am not afraid to fall onto my past mistakes like a dog eating it's own vomit
But I am afraid of meeting the unknown monster in new beginning's
You see often at time we tell ourselves that it's the mistakes in our past that we fear
When we are more afraid of getting out of our nightmares
Because the fear of finding the world way ahead of you and you having to start over and only to fail again is enough to make us stay in our traumas
But we are not victims of trauma
We are survivors
And survivors never stay in their challenges
They move on from them
So while you may be telling yourself your getting better by going back to the very thing that caused you pain
You are actually living in your nightmares
So I suppose the only comfort you can take from this is that
You are but a visitor in this life just
Watching the events of your life pass you by like a ghost on the streets
Allowing yourself to fall into depression and despair
By refusing to get help when you need it
Acting like the world owes you something when it doesn't
Get out! I say
Find out who you are
Are you the trauma or the present time
Because the trauma is but a brush of memory
You are a miracle.
So smile.
