Don't Be Scared

S2 E3 : 🛑 ZR 🛑 (Ch. 145)

"But that's it, right? I have literally no skills. You all only brought me along, because of Mack's skills he's adapted to. Had adapted to. Mack was a good shot; I never was but we all knew that if I couldn't come, he wouldn't be leaving."

"That's not it, (Y/N). Have you seen yourself fight? Couple more months of training with Warren, and I'm sure you could take down 10K."

A smile twitched at the tips of my lips at the encouragement. We both know I'd never be able to take down 10K. The guy has spent three years, alone, in the woods. He's trained by himself, hunted by himself.

Everything. I haven't. I've always been in a pack.

"None of us need each other, (Y/N). You could survive out there on your own; without Mack and without Warren. You could've but because of your luck and our luck, we're all stuck together. We only formed this group to become stronger."

She cupped both sides of my face as she stared into my eyes, showing me that she meant every single word that slipped out of her mouth.

"Mack died to make both of us stronger. His death may not have been ideal for us, but it was time for him to leave."

Tears automatically slid down my face at the mention of my deceased sibling. There was and will always be a hole in my chest from him. His absence will never go unnoticed. He is the reason I breathe today.

He'd want me here; with Addy and with Warren. Her thumbs dried the wet substances like windshield wipers that came on automatically, because she knew the effect the single name had on me.

"Now, come on. Let's get moving."

I nodded my head at her order, closing my eyes while she left me alone in the tent with 10K. He had yet to move from his sleeping position, but I think it was to keep from diverting attention to him.

"She's right. You were meant to survive the apocalypse." 10K said shortly.

I spun around on my butt to face him next.

"I think," I wiped the remaining tears that had slipped down after Addy's disappearance, "I was meant to survive this and meet all of you as well."

10K shared contact with me for a brief moment before sitting up and placing a large hand on top of my oily hair. He patted the messed up strands before removing himself from our shared quarters.

Mack died yesterday. He was taken from me and this earth in a simple five minutes. He was murdered from living. He was the victim of the assault, not me; I was a mere casualty. I have no reason to stop moving.

I can be sad about the whole ordeal, but that's it. Charlie's whole family was taken from him in a single day, but he continued to move without looking back. I didn't lose Addy, Warren, and Doc. I had the luck of keeping them in my life.

Mack spent three years keeping me alive--and making sure I had a little bit of food in my stomach--while my heart stayed in the past. I think to keep him alive spiritually, I need to move on completely.

From his death, from Charlie's death, from Cassandra's first death. I couldn't save any of them, even when I tried my hardest. I did my best, and now it's time to move on from all of them for good.

Taking a deep breath of the wooded scent, I felt the weight of the deaths fall off of my shoulders. I got out of the tent, stretching my legs. As soon as I lifted up from doing so, all eyes were focused on me like I was the main event at a circus.

No one said a word to me, only their eyes glued. Am I suppose to burst out in tears? They had stopped their conversations just for me, but didn't try to start one.

"You act like you've never seen someone get out of a tent. Jesus." I shrugged off their concerned stares, getting around to the sides of the tent to start removing the studs from the ground.

I know why they're staring at me: they're just waiting for another breakdown like yesterday's. I dont blame them. I probably am unstable.

• On the Road •

Warren and Vasquez had found a store they wanted to go check out for supplies; so, naturally they took the front of the van.
Doc, Cassandra, and Murphy were on the passenger side while 10K, Addy, and I took up the driver side of the vehicle.

Not once did I even glance at Murphy. I said I'd move on, not that I'd forget. And I won't ever.

"We're almost there. Maybe another mile or two." Vasquez informed everyone.

"What did you want to be before the apocalypse, 10K?" I asked, wanting to know.

I never heard much of anything about 10K's life before the out break.

|| Nobody will ever have you like we've got you ||