Wisdom Teeth 🤡

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a/n: GUYSSSS WTFFFF WTF WTF WTF WTF !!!!
i don't actually have anything to say i just felt like being dramatic.

WARNINGS: language 😳👉👈

BILL:

• um....nervous breakdown
• when he found out he had to take care of you while your parents were gone he IMMEDIATELY researched how to take care of you
• when he got to your house he had brought movies, blankets, and your favorite shirt of his along with a pair of pajama pants
• he thought you'd love it!!
• turns out you didn't even recognize him...
• "Who the f**k are you."
• "U-uh wh-what?"
• you may have thrown a pillow or two at him
• "STRANGER DANGER STRANGER DANGER!!"
• "Y-Y/n it's m-me B-Bill! It- it's your- your boyfriend!"
• "Cap. I'm married to the game."
• "What-what g-game?! Y-Y/n!"
• you apparently thought you were a basketball player
• yeah idk either
• "BALL IS LIFE!!"
• "P-Please put-put the b-bowl down!"
• eventually the pain medication wore off so the basketball persona got benched
• you were a moaning mess on the couch
• "This is it...I can see the light..."
• "That-Thats the t-tv."
• "Martha Stewart...? Is that you..? I'm in hell..."
• "M-Martha wh-who??"
• Bill was quick to give you some ice packs in hopes of reducing the swelling, you could barely speak now cuz your lips were so inflated
• "Bill i am stho sthowwy i hit you wif a piwwoh... hhbushibanhuh...habninhasheber..."
• "Shhh, j-just close your- your eyes and take a n-nap Y/n."
• you listened to Bill cuz 5mins later you were knocked tf OUT
• "F-finally..."
• Bill is glad this only has to happen once.

STAN:

• pretends to be annoyed but lowkey thrilled he gets to mom the shit outta you
• we all know Stanley is the mom of the group guys...cmon
• when he first sees you he cringes cuz of how puffed out your cheeks are from the gauze
• "You look like a chipmunk Y/n."
• "Suck my nuts Stanley."
• probably gives you like 500 pillows and tucks you in
• "I have more blankets if one isn't enough."
• "I'm not sick Stan....just my moves."
• "..."
• he will hold the ice pack up to your face, don't even try to fight him on this he's doing it
• if you start to talk he will quickly tell you to shut up because he doesn't want your gums to bleed more
• although his excuse is that you're annoying and he doesn't want to listen to you
• "Stan I'm hungryyyy!"
• "That's tough because the dentist said you aren't allowed to eat anything right now."
• "But I want pancakessss!!"
• "And I want you to be quiet."
• "....banana pancakes...."
• "Y/n shhh."
• ".....chocolate chip...."
• "I swear to-"
• "blueberry.."
• "Y/N-"
• when the pain meds wear off he's by your side 24/7 (not that he wasn't before, helicopter mom 🙄)
• holds your hand and rubs soothing circles on the back of it
• "It's alright darling, just breathe, you'll be fine the pain will pass."
• "Thank you obscure yellow car in toy story 3..."
• "Who tf-"
• Stan is crossing his fingers praying you'll pass out oop-

RICHIE:

• "Dude this is so gnarly-"
• he's not even concerned, just fascinated with how drugged up you are and how BEAT you look
• "Can you tell me how many fingers i'm holding up??"
• "Watermelon..."
• "Uhhh...you got it babe! Congrats!"
• "Did the pony get her raincoat?"
• "The fu-"
• you're pretty much babbling nonsense until it wears off
• "This is the weirdest puddle i've ever stepped in.."
• "But...but you're on the sofa..?"
• Richie is SO taking a picture to remember this moment for all eternity
• "Say cheese!!"
• "No my bicycle is trapped..."
• "That works too."
• He'll probably feed into you, even instigate
• i mean it's Richie
• "Babe who am I?"
• "....dad?"
• "I meannnnn-"
• all jokes aside as soon as you aren't loopy he stops messing with you (as much as possible) and attempts to take care of you
• granted he isn't good at it but at least he tries right ??
• "I am not touching that disgusting blood soaked gauze hell no. HELL NO."
• "....Can I look at it though? JUST A LITTLE BIT I ONLY WANT TO SEE IT- Y/NNNNN!"
• someone get him some help

EDDIE:

• poor baby
• poor poor baby
• he is in a constant state of panic
• he was not prepared for this
• even though he'd been preparing ever since he knew you'd be getting them pulled
• "How long do they bleed for? Can they get infected? The stitches dissolve right? How long does she have to wait before eating again? Can she drink water? What if her stitches get pulled? What if we run out of gauze? Is the gauze even sanitary? Should it go in her mouth?? I CAN'T BREATHE-"
• "I'm sorry I did not understand a single word you just said."
• probably won't sit next to you for a while but will constantly be standing at least three feet away from you just watching
• "Do you need anything? Ice pack? Blanket? Pillow? Gauze? Water? Duct tape? Rope? Trash bags? Wait what?"
• "Eddie I'm fine, just tired and sore is all."
• "Oh okay....but what about the bathroom? Do you have to go? Do you need help? I don't think it's very sanitary if I go in with you but i'm willing to sacrifice my health for you-"
• "Eddie bb no i'm good. Please stop worrying you're freaking me out!"
• he'll probably relax a bit after a while of nothing crazy happening, but he's still on edge just in case
• give this boy a gold star or smth idk

MIKE:

• literally the sweetest EVER
• i mean what did you expect honestly
• he'd probably have the most comfortable set up possible waiting for you
• doesn't let you get up unless absolutely necessary
• "Baby you really shouldn't be walking while this heavily medicated."
• "But I want a-"
• "An ice pack?"
• "....how the f**k did he know..."
• he also becomes a mind reader apparently??
• literally knows everything you need/want before you could
• "Do you want the gauze changed?"
• "Witchcraft..."
• "I grabbed you a blanket."
• "This is sus behavior my guy...are you the imposter?"
• teehee sike you didn't say that
• basically expect to be well taken care of
• you are in VERY good hands 😌

BEV:

• literally tries to get someone else to do it
• is willing to PAY THEM to do it
• "Richie you want 20 bucks?"
• "Hell yeah I do!"
• "Can you take care of Y/n after her wisdom teeth-"
• "Hell yeah I don't!"
• *cue Richie frantically running away*
• "Ohhhh Eddieeee~"
• "PLEASE NO-"
• It's not that they don't want to take care of you...it's that they're completely and utterly terrified of you
• you are unpredictable and add those loopy meds they give you ??? uh peace out-
• eventually she caves in (after Bill told her no...without stuttering...)
• as soon as she enters the house she immediately regrets it
• your pants were neatly folded by the front door, even your shoes were tucked away
• "I swear to god Y/n if you are nak-"
• she didn't even get to finish the sentence after she entered the kitchen
• you were currently trying to stuff your head in the freezer with just a big t shirt on
• "Bevy they stole my teeth and now i'm in painnn!"
• f in the chat for readers teeth
• "Why the hell aren't you wearing pants?"
• "They're a torture device designed by the government to confine our legs and make it so that we are uncomfortable therefore incapable of overthrowing them. I hereby stand with the no pants society and will join them in this new revolution as a new dawn rises and society is-"
• "Ok great but breakfast club is on chanel nine."
• "WHAT?!?"
• Beverly's plan worked and you got distracted by the movie
• she even somehow convinced you to at least put on shorts
• "The shorts only society will do so much better than the no pants society how did i never see this-"
• "I know hun, I'm a genius."
• big brain energy

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