Burning Heart

Acceptance And Denial

It was only for a few seconds that Seokjin was out.

When the young man was up again, he was calm as if he woke up from a nap and not from fainting. The oxygen mask was back over his mouth and nose, helping him to breathe better. He did not utter a word unless the doctor who was in the room again asked him about something as he checked him and informed him of his injuries and health as well as the treatment he will be having.

The doctor had not discussed the passing of the Kims again nor did he speak of the injuries they sustained other than the reason of their death he spoke of before which was determined as smoke inhalation since they died right on their bed, meaning they didn't even wake up or feel anything at all when their bodies burned severely to the extent where they can no longer be really recognized. The fire had started from the heater in their room so it was no surprise their bodies sustained a lot of damage but of course, the doctor was not going to tell this to Seokjin yet. He didn't look stable enough to hear this today. He was already worried about how much this was affecting the young man and to hear that he fainted so soon like this had him doing all kinds of check ups right away to make sure the idol was fine. He spoke to him about the oxygen mask and when it can be removed, telling him what to do and what to not do as well as how to take care of himself if he wants his hospital stay to not go on longer than needed.

Not so long after speaking with Seokjin, the doctor asked to speak with Sejin who gestured for Namjoon to follow before the three of them left the room. 

They've been told to keep a watchful eye on Seokjin and to not speak of his parents and brother much if it wasn't necessary but to help Seokjin through it and to listen to him if he tries to speak. He continued to tell them of how important it was to let the idol rest his throat and body as well as his mind if possible by speaking to him but to not expect him to reply since his throat and lungs were still damaged and in early treatment which will make speaking painful or hard for him. He spoke more into what could go wrong and what to watch out for. 

Later, Sejin had left the hospital and for hours after Namjoon was back from the doctor's office, no one really said anything to Seokjin who was silent the whole time, staring into space with a strong look in his eyes, indicating he was thinking deeply about something or maybe not thinking at all.

Seokjin heard every word that left anyone in the room. He heard Hoseok speak to him between his endless thoughts "I'll sit and stay here for you" The rapper said as he rubbed his leg from where he sat on the foot of the bed.

Taehyung had told him that it was fine to let it out and cry as much as he wants as he looked at him with a sympathetic look in his eyes.

Everyone had tried to say something to comfort him and show that they were there for him. That he could lean on them but Seokjin didn't want that now. He didn't want to hear these words because he was trying to bring warmth into his heart by not thinking about the whole matter of death but instead of what he had done in his break with his family, searching all of his memories for each smile he saw to keep them alive.

Hours and hours later when the sky was taking an orange color. Seokjin finally fell into sleep induced by physical and mental tiredness pain were taking a heavy toll over his whole being.

It was only when Seokjin was asleep that Namjoon spoke his thoughts in a small and careful tone after letting out a tired sigh.

"I can't believe this is happening...."He shook his head as he ran his fingers through his hair to bring back his bangs which fell right over his forehead again before resting his head back "I'm worried about his mentality...To lose everything at once...I can't imagine it. The doctor said to help him through it and listen to him if he speaks or cries but he's not even looking at us..."