Strictly Personal ( SEQUEL) - Completed ✔

Chapter 31

JK back hugs Jin as they walk to the guestroom on the first floor. Jin holds JK's hands as he brings him in front of him. He pulls JK to him and starts kissing him. They walk toward the bed. Jin stops, looks at JK, and JK senses his hesitation. "Shall we order in for lunch." JK asks, knowing that Jin is still having difficulty with what happened to him. He doesn't want to make it awkward for Jin, so he asks about eating to change the mood, and to not put pressure on Jin. "Yes." Jin answers after a moment of silence and they leave the guestroom. Jin wants to explain his hesitation to JK but he isn't quite sure how to express it. He knows JK is holding back for the sake of him, and it's not fair to JK. He, still after all this time, feels he betrayed the love of his life. He is in conflict with betrayal and intimacy.

After lunch they both relax. Then later, JK gets on his phone for a conference call and Jin goes to his home office and phones Hoseok. "Hey bro, how is it going?" Hoseok asks. "I called about a file." Jin states without delay. "Why are you working? Man take some time to get yourself together. You've been through hell." "I know Hoseok, but business is business. I can't enjoy personal time if business is in the way." "But your health is priority, but what file are you talking about since you called?" Jin and Hoseok continue their discussion and end their call. Jin finishes working on additional files while the events of yesterday plays in his mind. His thoughts are interrupted by JK's voice. "Jin, are you okay?" "I am now." He stands up and walks over to JK, lifting JK's chin with his fingers so that JK's lips can meet his. Jin kisses JK's lips softly. "I love everything about you Jungkook-ah."

Two days have passed, and the continued conflict between betraying JK and intimacy with JK has taken its toll. Jin is visiting with the Chief at his home. "Hey son, glad you took the time out to come visit, outside of my office." The Chief laughs, then notices Jin's somber mood. "You need to talk?" "I don't know if I can even talk about it, but I need something. I haven't been able to resolve it." "Come let's go to the bar, get a drink, and see if we can figure this out together." They are seated at the bar with their drink. "Okay start however you want." Jin struggles and can't bring himself to speak. "Son, there's no set rule on how to say what you need to say, or if you should say it. I love you and no matter what you say, I am here to guide you if I can, and it stays with me, you know that."

Jin takes a deep breath and struggles some more, sighs, then speak. "I can't get intimate with JK since the incident." Jin, uncharacteristically, hangs his head. "Son, nothing to be ashamed of. It's understandable That part of you has been traumatized, and you can't share it with JK because you feel it doesn't belong to just you and him anymore. It had been misused for someone's tainted purpose. You had held that part of you only for JK. In your heart, it still belongs to only you and JK, that haven't changed. Something terrible happened to a part of you, but it doesn't make that part of you terrible. From what I see, JK still wants you, all of you. "I know you are trying to wrap your mind around what happened to you, the tycoon, Kim Seokjin. Son, that was not a deal that you couldn't broker, or something your brilliant mind couldn't resolve. You were illegally drugged by a doctor and put in a state where you couldn't even use that brilliant mind or control the outcome with your gifted skills. It was not due to your failure."

"I feel like a failure." "Me, someone who is smarter than that, and I fail at stopping it from happening." "Jin, of course you are smarter than what happened to you, and please listen to me." Jin's head is in his hands. "Son, being smarter isn't an assurance that bad things won't happen in your life. Remember the time you were canoeing and a bigger than usual wave came and took you out. You had no control of what happened, even though you were skilled at canoeing, something unforeseen happened and you experienced cold shock, hypothermia, and you were physically hurt and mentally damaged. You were even ashamed due to it. Even though you were skilled at it, you blamed yourself because you knew your skills were impeccable but yet it happened. Remember?" Jin nods his head, somewhat looking at the Chief. "Jin, think about that incident and how you came back despite the damage, the shame, and feeling defeated. I know it doesn't compare to what has just happened, but the same inner strength of yours that pushed forward to overcome the canoeing incident is still within you and it still can overcome any conflict.  Look Jin."  The Chief points at a large, gold cup sitting on the mantle in the room. It was the ICF Masters Canoe Marathon World Cup awarded to Jin. Jin takes in everything as he looks at the cup. They continue talking for a while then Jin leaves with a resolve.

Jin had been at home all day making a feast for JK. JK returns from being at his office, showers, and goes downstairs to Jin. Jin leads JK to the outdoor enclosed patio. JK is always captivated by the scenery when he goes out on the patio. The insulated glass window that surrounds the patio shows the snow falling and meeting the flakes that have already started accumulating on the ground and window. The roaring colors of red and orange flames from the fireplace, seems to be swaying to the sounds of the soft jazz music that is playing. There are trails of Tiger Lilies leading to a bed .The mist from the steam in the Jacuzzi beautifully contrasts the cold snowy atmosphere outside. JK becomes teary eyed. He smiles and turns to Jin. Jin notices JK crying, holds his face and stares into his teary eyes. "You are my life. Every day with you has giving me a purpose. You've been my happiness, my strength, my peace, my thoughts, and my time. Everything about you completes me." Jin becomes emotional by looking at JK, whose tears began falling on Jin hands. He wipes JK tears.

"I'm sorry Jin. For the times I doubted your love, for giving myself to another, for blaming you for." Before JK utters another word, Jin begin kissing JK then kisses the tears that had fallen on JK's cheeks. He gently wraps JK in an embrace. "You have nothing to apologize for. You're perfect Jungkook-ah. Let me be the imperfect one." Jin looks at JK and lifts JK's face so that they are face to face. He softly kisses JK's lips until their tongue meet. He guides JK to the bed, lays him down, and continues passionately kissing him. The house assistant buzzes the intercom on the patio. "Mr. Kim, I have what you requested."

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