Buckle up!
Billie's pov
"So that's all I was to you Billie?" She gets up moving from her damaged locker towards me,she drops her brother's picture to dirty school floor filled with cheese that was covering her clothes and hair too.
My friends move back slightly but I don't find the courage to,her dark eyes have me as a target,she was sucking my soul through her big nerdy glasses and I could only surrender to my fate.
She's shorter than me by two inches,she looks hurt that I'd actually taken the time I spent with her for granted just for a few dollars,but I couldn't let anyone know I'd caught feelings for her.
I was thee bitch.
The one who broke everyone's hearts,had a higher body count than the stripper round the corner,that rich spoiled brat... That's what they all knew me as.
But y/n... she read through me,she knew exactly who was under all that act I put up so bravery,all I wanted was to be babied just once at least and I got scared,I didn't want to hurt her,I didn't want to feel good whenever she was around I didn't want to be dependent on her so I did the only thing I knew.
I took that bet back at the party,she was my tutor assigned by my maths teacher,I was to make her fall for me,only I didn't have to make her she made me fall for her instead.
Self sabotage is a sanctuary for my brain every other day.
Her snarky remarks,not taking shit from anyone, straight A's. She also wore a mask underneath all that broke nerd outfit lay this rich,beautiful, confident girl who I could never have the confidence of talking to without making a fool of myself in normal circumstances.
"Yes" was all I could muster to say once she was in my face,she stared deep into my eyes and I fought so hard not to look away,so hard to hold the tough exterior I'd always had but then again this was y/n she knew me better.
The fire in her eyes grew slightly dim and I felt tears pool at the back of my eyes. I simply pushed past her and the crowd that had formed heading straight for the exit, ignoring the stares I got and my friends. I didn't want her to look at me that way.
I didn't want the love,it scared the hell out of me,It makes me feel vulnerable.
Jumping in my car I drive off to my favorite spot on a cliff overlooking the sea, getting out I sit down holding myself together trying to get back to a right state of mind.
Taking a deep breath I let a tear fall when I remember how broken she felt at first I hated watching her kneeling down yelling for the one who destroyed her brother's picture.
He died when she needed him the most it broke her but she pushed on and I destroyed one the favorite memories she had with him.
My heart tugged at me and I let out an angry yell,I just had to win a bet I probably let go of the only happiness I've ever felt.
"I knew I'd find you here" now I'ma hallucinating about her,I'm pathetic.
Footsteps sound behind me and I turn fast and find her standing there changed in some fresh clothes the cheese I'd dunked on her all gone from her hair,she probably went home to clean up,I dunno what comes over me all I do is stand and run to her holding her close.
She wraps her hands around me too I sigh in relief.
"Don't cry Bil" she smiles as she pulls away wiping a tear running down my cheek making me feel guilty all over again.
"I'm sorry I just––" "shut up" she kisses me on my cheek making me turn red.
"C'mon" she pulls me to the edge again sitting down she lays her head on my shoulder. I turn slightly taking a whiff of her hair as I notice her bike next to my car.
"You can always go back Bil,you aren't entitled to stay the same forever" she says taking her head off my shoulder and I sigh.
"I'm not that strong, it'll break me"
"♪ She grew up, always tried to fit in" she sings making me groan she always does this song therapy when she found out how much i loved music.
"♪Hometown started feeling like a prison" she continues trying to get me to join her.
"♪So obsessed with everything she isn't
Brainwashed by a television" i smile at her stubborn ass turning away.
"♪Blink of an eye
Time flew by
Everything changed like that
When the lights go off
The music stops" she stands pulling me with her.
"♪Do you wish someone would ask?" I groan watching as she twirled me around I break before screaming the lyrics out with her.
"♪Are you happy right now where you at, girl?
Do you still get drunk when you're sad, girl?
Did you finally find love in this mad world?
Is it everything you thought?
Are you happy right now where you at, girl?
Did the money go straight to your head, girl?
Did you grow up a little too fast, girl?
'Cause if you did, you can always go back
Girl"
"I didn't realize how much I missed that" I whisper burying my head into the crook of her neck.
"You can always go back Bil" closing my eyes I get lost in the peace,I didn't want it to end I needed it,I craved it.
I didn't want the teenage drama in my life,I wanted positivity and I think I just found it.
A/N
Are you happy right now where you at,girl?
M,
