I Won't Give Up (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Chapter 5

You woke up later than usual, your head heavy with the lack of sleep. The events of last night had kept you up until you had no choice but to pass out. You were constantly replaying the night in your head, wondering how you could be so foolish to believe Bucky actually wanted you. The soreness in your legs only made you that much more upset. You wished you could heal yourself so you wouldn't be reminded of your mistake.

You reluctantly rolled out of bed and threw on one of Sam's hoodies you had stolen, along with some compression shorts. Rubbing your tired eyes, you opened the door, but stopped as Bucky fell on his back with a thud. He groaned in pain as you stood in shock.

"Damn, that hurt," he spoke as he stood up. You were frozen where you stood, noticing Bucky was wearing the same sweats as last night, now with a hoodie, and he had deep bags under his eyes.

"What are you doing? Why were you outside of my door?"

Bucky rubbed the back of his head and hesitantly looked at you. "I've been here since you left my room. I tried knocking, but Friday said you were in the shower. I must have fallen asleep while I waited. Can we please talk?"

You silently weighed your options. You wanted nothing more than to shut the door in his face, but you had to think of the team. No matter how much you two hated each other, you never let it get in the way of a mission. You were afraid that this was going to be the one thing that would affect your job.

Stepping aside, you invited him into your room. He walked in and stood awkwardly in the center as he looked over your room. You shut the door and took a deep breath to calm yourself down before turning around and crawling on your bed to sit against your headboard. Bucky eyed you questionably before sitting at the end of the bed.

The two of you sat in silence as Bucky gathered his thoughts. He didn't want to mess this up again, so he chose his words carefully.

"What happened last night wasn't about getting information from you. I'm sorry I made you think that. I shouldn't have asked what I did when I did, but when we were laying there I just wanted to know everything about you."

You opened your mouth to speak, but Bucky was quick to stop you. "Just let me finish. I've wanted this - I've wanted you for so long. In that moment, I just wanted to get to know you better. I know that was a horrible time to ask, and I'm sorry for that. I care about you, (y/n). I always have. I thought I had made you hate me too much already, so I didn't say anything. It killed me every day, doll. Especially having to see you so close with Wilson."

You couldn't help but laugh. Bucky's eyebrows scrunched in confusion at your sudden mood change. You wiped the tears from your eyes and struggled to speak. "M-me and Sam? That - oh that is the funniest thing I've ever heard."

You proceeded to laugh as Bucky stared at you. He noticed how easily your eyes watered when you laughed and how your nose crinkled up. When you finally calmed down, Bucky was looking at you with a small smile on his face. "You're so adorable when you laugh."

You blushed at the compliment and bit your bottom lip. You averted your eyes from him and played with the strings of Sam's hoodie. Bucky scooted closer to you, now sitting in the middle of the bed with his arms resting on his bent knees. Silence filled the room as you considered his words. You were scared that if you told him about your past, about where you were kept, he would never want anything to do with you again. However, you cared about him too. You weighed your options before deciding that if you were going to lose him because of this, it would hurt less to lose him now rather than later.

You took a deep breath and began to tell him your story. You kept your eyes on the strings of the hoodie, afraid to make eye contact. You told him the story of when you were born. The supposed 'miracle' that you were. You told him about your time in the orphanage and how you constantly felt alone until a man came to adopt you.