the wind above the ocean // taekook

seven.

3:00 am - finding hope

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"maybe i should go."

"stop saying that."

"but i don't want to be a bother."

"Jungkook stop being stupid. first of all - you have nowhere else to go and i wouldn't be your friend if i didn't let you live here. second of all - i like having you here. it's nice having company. you know i don't like being alone. and third of all - who will cook for me when you're gone?"

Jungkook had thought about leaving every single day since he first crashed at Taehyung's place. 2 whole weeks.

he enjoyed staying at his friends house. they sat on the back porch drinking coffee or tea, played with their cats, watched the sunset and talked for hours about everything and nothing at the same time. he cooked for the older, teaching him how to make perfect ramen. laughed when he failed miserably, over and over again.

but he couldn't ignore that feeling. heavy in his chest, right where his heart was. he had been carrying it around even back in his old room, in the house up the hill. the feeling of being a burden. he still hasn't told Taehyung why he ran away. how did he dare to call himself a friend when he couldn't even tell him the truth? weren't friends supposed to be honest with each other?

and there was this second feeling. at first only small and inconspicuous, in the very back of Jungkook's head. he had ignored it, banished it from his thoughts. but with time it became more and more difficult not to think about it. it made more space for itself, not only in his head - it took over his heart, made itself noticeable in his every step.

he had a crush on Taehyung.

again.

and the worst thing about it all - Taehyung had a girlfriend.

he had found out a few days ago. when the older was still in university. Jungkook was a very curious guy but too shy to ask for a house tour. so he went up to the other's bedroom, looked through his stuff a bit. he didn't open up any drawers or moved stuff around, too scared Taehyung would notice things looking different. but he didn't have to. a collection of pictures and cards and other small things came in sight, spread randomly across one of the walls.

he remembered walking closer to it, letting his finger glide over the souvenirs, smiling at family photos and medals won for photography or poetry competitions. that was where he found it. between birthday cards and concert tickets. his smile dropping a little as his finger reached for the corner. a polaroid picture of a girl kissing Taehyung on the cheek. he wore a party hat and had cake batter on his nose, smiling brightly. it must have been at his last birthday party.

she was pretty. tan skin, long brown locks, glittery eyeshadow. Jungkook couldn't help but feel jealous of her. jealous of the way she could kiss the guy of her dreams without people staring weirdly or telling her that it was wrong.