my brothers girlfriend

him or me

TWENTY-FIVE - JENNIE

On Thursday night, I can't sleep. Not even when I turn my phone off to ignore Lisa's incessant pleas to see me. I know I'd sleep better if I caved and invited her around, but I'm learning to be firmer in my decisions and not do things or not do them for comfort. That's how I was gonna get through tomorrow. 

I understood Lisa was probably sick with anxiety. Probably even more so than me, but once it was over it would all be fine and me ignoring her calls tonight wouldn't matter because she'd be too busy celebrating. 

I could picture it. How she would try and hide her smile but fail terribly when I told her it was finally over. Just imagining that cheesy grin made my lips turn up. She probably wouldn't even be able to find the words at first. She would just hug me tight and we wouldn't need words to tell each other how happy we were. And then I would tell her I love her. I couldn't think of the words right now to tell her just how deep this love went. I'm sure when the time came I would find them without struggle.

I hear birds singing and light breaks through the gaps in my blinds and I'm still thinking about Lisa and her silly grin and how excited I was to see her. It's almost enough for me to forget what I had to do. But I know my happiness with Lisa comes with a price and today was the day to pay it.

I think I've come to terms with it more now. People get dumped every day. Kai would get over it. I couldn't afford to protect his feelings anymore. 

But Kai isn't coming over until late afternoon and there are so many hours to kill before then. I know sleep is necessary and ultimately unavoidable since I haven't gotten a wink all night. I turn my phone back on a read all of Lisa's impatient, slightly deranged messages with a smile. 

me- DOOMSDAY :)

I send her one simple word before turning my phone back off and finally drifting to sleep with the knot in my stomach having loosened. 

+

It's past noon when I wake to a pounding on my door. I groan, squint my eyes and turn over mumbling for whoever it is to go away. 

"Jennie!" It's my mum calling.

"Mmmppf.. go way...hmpfff...go.." I pull the sheet tighter over me and hope my incorrigible mumbling is enough for my mum to get the message. 

She knocks harder. "Jennie, you're friend is here."

Friend?

"Hey, Jennie!"

Lisa.

My eyes snap open and I jump out of bed with the sheet still half hanging off me. I open the door and barely glance at my mother. I grab Lisa's arm and drag her into the room before slamming the door in my mum's face.

I turn to face her, ready to give her a proper verbal slashing but her annoying toothy grin stops me. 

It had been too long since I had last seen her and I had missed her so much. 

I fall into her body, wrapping my arms around her neck and melting into her warmth. She was so soft and enticing like a bed and I was still groggy. I whine quietly into her neck and jerk my body up. She gets the message and grabs my thighs, lifting me with ease so I can wrap them around her waist.

She takes us both to bed.

"You're not mad?" She teases.

"I'm so mad," I mumble without pulling my face away from the soft comfort of her skin. She chuckles.