❝𝑮𝑳𝑶𝑹𝒀 𝑵𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑪𝑨𝑴𝑬 𝑬𝑨𝑺𝒀❞
in which two of hogwarts' biggest opposites are more alike than they thought.
☼
or:
in which sage fontaine and sirius black don't know how to talk to each other outside of social media.
〖MARAUDERS-ERA SOCIAL...
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sageybabyspam: woke up this morning with sirius's jacket on and no i will not be giving it back tagged: padfootspam
lilythelion: ARE THOSE MY PANTS
↳sageybabyspam: let me rephrase: i woke up this morning in your pants, marlene's shirt, and sirius's jacket
padfootspam: first you steal my leather jacket, now you steal my track jacket. what's next? my denim jacket?
↳sageybabyspam: once i figure out where you're keeping it, absolutely ↳prongsspam: he hides it under all his robes in his trunk because he knows you have a habit of stealing clothes ↳sagebabyspam: thanks, j ↳padfootspam: if i find sage in my room when i get back upstairs i'll kill you, potter ↳sageybabyspam: sorry, sirius. already here. what's this parchment you've got hidden under your pillow? ↳padfootspam: PUT IT DOWN SAGE ↳sageybabyspam: i'm your girlfriend, sirius. not your dog. don't tell me what to do
loonymoony: i'm surprised sirius has any clothes left at this point
↳maiadoescrack: for the love of merlin this girl steals more clothes than anyone i've ever met
prongsspam: i don't know why you never bring any clothes with you when you come sleep over in gryffindor tower because you always leave with like 5 people's stuff
↳sageybabyspam: i never plan on sleeping over, it just happens. besides, your girlfriend's bed is comfier than mine so i like sleeping in your dorms ↳lilythelion: can confirm that our beds are more comfortable than the dorms in the dungeons
reglikessnakes: i see you haven't grown out of your kleptomania phase
↳ageybabyspam: why should i spend my money on clothes when i can just steal them from other people? ↳reglikessnakes: sage, you're literally loaded you could buy the entirety of gringotts why are you so against shopping for yourself ↳sageybabyspam: because money doesn't buy happiness
rothehoe: well, now i know what i'm getting sagey for her 18th
↳chachajoyner: she'll hex you if you get her anything, you know that ↳sageybabyspam: yes i will
