Bts sickfics (cause there really aren't enough)- REQUESTS CLOSED

Jungkook - autism

i know i already did an autism chapter lol. But this time its kookie! aka the member most likely to be actually autistic irl out of all of them lol.

I also have the courage to say this, this time...

i am autistic. 

well, im not diagnosed, but before you all go saying "SeLf DiAgNoSiS iS bAd", hear me out here. I have been researching autism since about march, i relate to the majority of symptoms, it feels like a fitting explanation to why i am the way i am, i relate to other autistics, and i DO intend on getting tested at some point once i gain the courage to actually start that process, because spoiler alert: its not an easy process. At all.

I didn't take one online test and now walk around saying im autistic for attention. I've taken more tests than i can count, highlighted checklists, spoken to other autistic people, watched tons of youtube videos and tiktoks about autism, and i have come to this conclusion. I'm only open about it online.

So yeah, if you try and come at me for it i'll just ignore you.

anyway lets just get on with the chapter shall we :)

inspired by a thing that happened to me one day lol

"Sorry, could you speak up a bit?" 

Jungkook sighed. He heard that phrase all the time. He hated it.

"My name is jeon jungkook, im 13 years old."

His mind was telling him to sway on his feet, play with his fingers, but he resisted, stood up tall and still.

"ok, you may start."

He took a deep breath in and started singing. Everyone always told him he became a different person when he sang. The jungkook everyone knew was quiet, shy, reserved, very in-his-own-world. But when he sung, its like he was suddenly confident. Suddenly he became a different kid. 

The judges kept their poker faces on as they scribbled down notes on the paper. He was definitely a keeper. Had real potential. But as soon as he stopped singing, he went back to being quiet, mumbling. 

"Sorry, what was that?" 

"T-thank you." 

Jungkook sighed. He was getting frustrated. Why did everyone always make him repeat himself and speak louder? 

"Ok, we'll contact you within the next few weeks with the results." The judge flashes a polite smile, but jungkook just continues to stare wide eyed, and bows, like he was always taught to do. 

He walks out the door with composure, but the moment the door closes he flaps his hands, whining. His parents lead him away from the crowd of other kids as he whines. This always happens. He'd beg to be taken to auditions, but he'd come out of them frustrated and upset.

"what happened kookie. Tell us. Use your words." He shook his head, still flapping his hands frantically. "yes you can come on, speak to us and we can help you." 

Other heads turned to him, curious kids staring, a slight sneer in their glare. Parents looking on with judgement. To them it looked like jungkook must have majorly messed up, and well, to jungkook thats what it felt like.

His mind kept replaying that one note that he sang sharp. It replayed over and over in his head. It was sharp. The note was sharp. To jungkook that was the end of the world. In reality the judges didn't even notice it. But jungkook did. And he hated it.

The flapping of hands turned to hitting his head with grunts, and the other kids and parents just watched with shock. Jungkooks parents panicked, pulling his hands away.