Summer Nights (Camren)

Chapter 7

Lauren's POV

"But-" I tried to speak, but was cut off by a fearful Camila that obviously had a lot to say.

"Listen Lauren..you have probably been in a lot of relationships and know how this works by now. I on the other hand have been in one and can't bare to deal with that type of heartbreak again. I understand that you might like me now, but what about when camps over and we have to go home? I want to give you everything and I do really like you...it's just so hard. What if you don't actually like me and just think that you do? My last relationship has affected me a lot and I just can't trust anyone anymore.  It really sucks because I have a huge crush on you and you're so perfect..." she shook her head, knowing that she had practically broke my heart into a million pieces.

"You are perfect and I would never break your heart Camz....I can't get through this summer without being with you. I need you. I'm not like Jay or any other idiot and it's so upsetting that you won't give me a chance. I really really like you, Camila. And I know that this is all new and confusing for you, trust me," I tried to say as convincingly as possible.

She forced her eyes shut and thought for awhile while I remained silent. We were hanging around outside of the recreation room when we decided to finally talk about what had happened the night before. Camila admitted that she liked me...but just wasn't ready or as trusting as she wanted to be.

"Ok..ok. I'm going to need to think really hard about this. I don't want to make the wrong choice. Please just give me some space for a little bit and I'll tell you in the morning. Is that ok?" She asked, concerned with how I would take it if it was bad news.

"Sure," I replied, trying to seem as calm as possible. My nerves were taking over my whole body and I felt as though I was in a different planet.

I knew what I needed to do. I didn't want to do it and I understood that it was risky, but it was my only option at that time. Without doing this, I would have been even more of a mess.

---

"Now you want it?" Jess asked, sort of annoyed that I was this late on taking her up on her offer.

"Come on. Please? I'm kind of in a situation that I would rather not talk about..I need to get my mind off of it and chill out," I responded, trying to convince her to smoke with me.

"Well...we all have situations. I guess I'll let you smoke with me. But next time we do it when I wanna have fun, Lo! Come on let's go behind the cabin. Only a few hits..." Jess added, running up the hill with excitement.

"Hey! I'm not that fast!" I yelled, trying to keep up with her speed.

When we finally reached the cabin, Jess directed me to the back where she kept her "stash". She didn't have much since she was occasionally smoking it alone every other day, but she had enough to help me with what I needed it for. She quickly rolled two joints and handed me one of them. I was taking hit after hit like it was nothing and all of the pain seemed to just go away. I couldn't focus on much and Jess was even worse. She started talking about ponies that were apparently sleeping in the palmtrees and how the sharks in the ocean were going to bite all of the campers.

"S-so like what do we do if we can't make it back i-inside?" I asked, struggling to stand up and form sentences.

"We sleep here!!" Jess laughed uncontrollably and pointed in a million different random directions. She mumbled random math equations and crawled on the ground...it was anything but normal.

After awhile of sitting on the ground and finishing our joints, we heard some footsteps that suddenly stopped and seemed to dissapear. We smoked a little bit more as if we had never started.

I barely heard someone clear their throat probably loudly and instantly turned around to find Camila staring at us with tears steaming down her face.

"Oh my god! Oh my god!" She screamed in disbelief and hesitated with where to move next. Her eyes darting around, but kept eventually landing on me.

"Camila! Wait!" I tried to scream, as I attempted to follow her back inside the cabin. Jess stayed put, not wanting to make more of a scene or cause any drama.

I barely made it back inside before I shut the door the best I could due to the state I was in. Camila stared at me like I was some sort of monster and my heart sank.

"H-how could you, Lauren?!" She yelled through her tears. She was hurt and shocked.

My heart shattered.

"I'm sorry. I needed to get my mind off of everything...believe me." She stared at me for awhile before actually speaking and I wondered whether or not she hated me.

"I don't know anymore...obviously you probably don't even know what you're saying at this point. Why would you put your life in danger and risk us all getting kicked out of camp?! I thought you knew how much this meant to me...I-I guess you don't. I don't know why I was starting to trust you..." Camila admitted, rethinking everything out loud.

"Don't say that Camz...I really like you. Let's talk..." I whispered while playing with her hair, stlil not able to focus that well.

"No. I'm sorry...I can't talk to you when you're like this. We can talk tomorrow..."

"Ok," was all I could say, not wanting to anger her more.

Jess opened the door to the cabin and without saying a word, went to bed. Everyone else was on their way back up as I got changed and Camila crawled into her bunk, still sobbing. I couldn't blame her. I was such an idiot!

I really hoped that I didn't ruin everything. I cared about Camila more than I had ever cared about another human being....and it scared me that I was falling in love with her. I didn't know how to handle myself or the situation.