That won't happen to you

Chapter 62

For a little moment, she lay propped up on her arm.

Her head was buzzing.

Her arms ached.

Her legs ached.

Her lekku felt like they were on fire.

Every breath seemed to burn her lungs.

Her whole body was screaming at her to stop.

She made no effort to do so.

She pulled her other arm back, pulled her elbow up and supported her weight on her hand.

She pulled the arm that was under her back to her side, and leaning herself there on her hand as well.

She turned to the side and pushed one leg forward to have a stable stand.

It worked. Slowly but surely she got up. Blindly, and with her body screaming in pain, but she got up. Slowly and steadily.

She pushed herself upright until she was finally sitting.

It felt good to sit. Especially after it was so difficult to get into this position.

She smiled slightly, and for a moment just enjoyed the air playing around her lekku with light wind.

The air was free.

It was truly free and unbound.

Not like herself, who was stuck on the ground, unable to soar to the heights her mind craved.

Her mind? No, more like her insatiable fighting spirit that was looking for something up there somewhere.

Something she knew was there, but not where, or what it was.

While her fighting spirit throbbed incessantly inside her, she felt empty.

So infinitely empty.

As if someone had taken half of herself and torn it out of her.

And the place where this part of her belonged was left behind, bleeding and lifeless, without purpose and without meaning.

Alone, and abandoned.

But her fighting spirit continued to throb.

It did not let her rest, it did not let her rest.

And above all, he did not let her give up.

No, he never had, and he never would.

Because what kept this girl going, what kept her from breaking the way Dooku wanted her to, wasn't the Force. Or Gil. Or Lou.

It was herself.

That stubbornness deep inside her that forced her to pick up the pieces of her soul every time, put them together, and move on.

And the more often she broke.

The more she survived.

The more she grew together again,

the stronger it became.

That's why Dooku hadn't managed to break it.

That's why Ryak hadn't been able to.

Or Gil's betrayal.

Or the loss of the Force.

Or the loss of her sight.

Or anything else.

She was too stubborn for that, and she always would be.

And so she slowly got to her feet.

She stood up. And looked around with blind eyes, seeing nothing but darkness.

Carefully, ignoring the pain, she walked a little.

She was, Powerless, Helpless, Blind, Alone, Abandoned, and she didn't give it a shit.

She was standing. She had fighting spirit. And she had hope.

So Ahsoka Tano walked off into the unknown.