Tanhì

7: Tìpaw

I had told Mo'at of my struggles with my teacher and I'm sure she consulted grace since she's here lecturing me about playing nice.

"It's not that hard Hela, you just have to tolerate him." she sighed.

"You try tolerating him and his exhausting training and his stinging insults. It's not as easy as it looks." I scoff, "Look, I want to make it, but not with him kicking my ass the whole time." 

"Then be assertive, tell him to stop kicking your ass or kick his ass. not literally." grace chuckled, "We have to make sure our bonds are secure because we eventually need to move them. We want them to trust us when we ask them to move."

"That's a whole other debate I'm not getting into. But thank you Grace, I'll do my best." I said tiredly. 

--------------------

"Tsu'tey!" I called, "I must speak with you." I approached his normal hangout area. It's a secluded place near the pa'li and the river.

"What do you want?" he hissed. His mood turned sour.

"I'm tired of you pushing me like that. You hiss and yell at me all the time. I know you don't like me, but give me a break from your pissy attitude. I came here to learn, not to be insulted." I groaned.

"If you want me to stop insulting you, fine. But do not misunderstand, you will never be welcome here! Your kind. You aliens trample everything you see. Not just you." he sulked. He was leaned up against a tree, surrounded by fruit bearing plants and objects related to his family. A necklace of his mothers, a knife from his father, and a toy Ikran and bow from when his brother was small. He cherished his family and his people but never showed it. I had walked in during a time of silence and peace. 

"I should go-"

"You are already here. We will continue your lessons here for today." he said softly. "As I can tell from your uncomfortable expression, you know what this place is to me. When one becomes important to the clan, they have little time to spend with their family. And you seek to become a lore keeper within the clan." He stood up and placed all of his family's things into a hole in the tree. "If it is possible you must learn to cope with it."

"Tsu'tey,I don't have any family." I said slowly, "They are where I came from, but I don't think I'm going back for a very long time." I sighed. His brows furrowed and his mouth hung open as if he were to say something. He did not. He closed his mouth and set his hand on my shoulder.

"You bear a pain I hope I will never know. That is if you feel the same way about your family as I feel for mine." He said faintly. It would've been comforting if it weren't for the fact that the only ones I missed were already moving on. It's been a almost seven years since I left. I smile a little at Tsu'tey for his words.

"I don't feel that way at all, I'm happy for them and I hope they're happy for me. And that's enough." I whisper. His hand fell from my shoulder as I stood up and turned away.

"We should continue lessons." I say firmly. I stepped out of his cove area and went to go unlink. I needed some time.

--------------------

Knowing each other  better helped the learning go smoother. Grace had taken notice of my attitude appearing and Mo'at seemed to smile when she saw us getting along. I guess our conflict was bothering them as much as it bothered us. 

Soon I was learning quicker and things were going well until tracking. I was untalented at it but my willingness to succeed pushed me forward. Tsu'tey always seemed confounded by my successes. He started making things harder for me so I's catch up with everyone else who are going to Iknimaya.

 I was excited but very nervous about heights. Everyday we were working on heights and fears and I found myself hitting a wall every time we did climbing lessons. Tsu'tey never called me by my name but always made sure he knew it. Always an offshoot of my name. Lela, kikou, helay, just being rude about it, but atleast he knew it.

He drove me to be better than I thought I could be and there I was. Better.