𝙘𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙨 (𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙖 𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙤𝙪)

chapter twenty.

1975, present. WARNINGS: ABORTION.

(flashback to when don tooru made the deal, this is what inarizaki was up to.)

he swallowed, signing up the final documents and passing them over to osamu. shinsuke ran a hand through his hair, and a vein was visible on his forehead. osamu sighed in pity. 

"those are the last documents, don. your wife is waiting for you, you know? you should see her." the grey-haired male persuaded, and the don just nodded. there wasn't a day that he didn't blame himself for what had happened to marie. she was just as upset as he was, if not more. 

the woman stepped inside, motioning osamu to leave, in which he did. kita didn't even turn around to speak with her directly, he was angry at himself and he didn't want marie to see him in such a state. 

"why do you think that?" she asked him, barely above a whisper but kita managed to hear it. 

"think what?"

"that this would happen, shinsuke. it made me think of what you once told me: "'in five years the kita family will be completely legitimate, exactly what we both dreamed of.' that was so many years ago." marie drawled, her index finger wiping a thin coat of sweat from her forehead. 

"i know, i'm trying darling. and i know that you are indeed mad at me." shinsuke stood up, turning around so that he could face her. she wiped her forehead again. 

"you had a miscarriage, and i believe that you do blame yourself and blame me every day for it. you know how much that pains me to see, baby? it's as if a part of me is dying every time i witness you do that. we couldn't have stopped it, you know? we can try again, as many times as you want. we can have a baby, we just have to keep trying. i know we can do it, love." the don sighed. reassuring wasn't really something that shinsuke was necessarily good at, especially not in situations like this one for example. 

but he was caught off guard when he heard a light laugh coming from his wife. 

"oh, shinsuke. shinsuke, you are blind." marie chuckled lightly. confusion was written upon her husband's features. "it wasn't a miscarriage, it never was." 

she stood up, facing her husband to look at him dead in the eye. 

"it was an abortion. an abortion, shinsuke. just like how our marriage is an abortion. something that's unholy, evil and disgusting. i didn't want your child, shinsuke! i wouldn't bring another one of your children into this world! i would never have wanted to! i had no say in this! it was an abortion, shinsuke kita!"

his eyes were larger than they have ever been before. his lips were thin, like it was difficult for words to come out of his mouth. he just stared at the ground, trying to process what his wife was saying. kita wanted this to be over, he didn't know what to do. intrusive thoughts were something and him and rintarou suffered with for the longest time. and the man never dared to hit a woman, not even to the one that he loved and sworn to protect his entire life with. so how come he had a sudden urge to right at this moment?

"it was a son kita! a son!" oh how it hurt him to hear her refer to him by last name. "and i had it killed because this must all end!" marie yelled, tears threatening to block her vision.

"i know now that it's over. there would be no way, kita... no way you could ever forgive me. and i don't want you too. not with this, mafia world in your blood that's been going on for 2,000 year-"

slap. 

< - - >

the world is made of terror, anger and sadness all mixed into a compound. burning sensations on pale faces of skin. every human experiences terror in different ways than one another, so indeed it wouldn't be unordinary for the emotions of marie to automatically feel terrified. 

shinsuke never dared to strike her, the stinging sensation slowly becoming numb when she came control of her emotions again. she saw his eyes were wider and he looked feral as if the man had a desire to kill. her pale lips and dark eyes looked back up at him, and he yelled once more.  

"bitch. you will not take my children!" he screamed out. 

"i will." she whispered, "i will do it the amount of times as there are stars in the sky."

"YOU WILL NOT TAKE MY CHILDREN!" she held up her hand, motioning for her husband to be quiet. and silently, she removed the pale blue and silver engagement ring from her finger. 

"they are my children too, don."

a/n: this is pre- y/n making the deal with oikawa, literally kay and micheal corleone-