• Kpop stories •

Kim Jonghyun

{ 4 years }

This is still an open wound. A wound that get infected every time someone mentions his name. A wound that should stop hurting after all this time, but it just seem to be worst. Everyday are wasted without him, but you still have to continue your life to at least honour him. You know the only thing he would have wish for was that you loved happily ever after. But it's hard. Everything seems to be less illuminated since he disappeared, life changed.
Key called you this morning.

~~

"Y/N! How are you doing?" His playful voice made you smile. "Good what about you?"
"Well, you know me. Me and the boys talked and we wanted to do a little something today for Jonghyun, we thought you could have liked to be here with us, what do you think?"
Your heart squeezed. Jonghyun. The word you tried avoiding today. It is his birthday and the pain seem to heavier than usually since it was supposed to be his day. You know Key did not wanted to make you sadder and just wanted to distract you from crying all day. You are still not sure if you should go or not... At the same time, you did not see Onew, Key and Minho since they came back of their military service.

And Taemin got so occupied during this time you barely talked with him. You miss them, it is true and it would be good for your soul to see them.

"So? Are you coming or not?" You Kinda forgot you were on a call with Key and did not answer back. "Yeah, I think I really need this." "Perfect! I will tell Minho to get you on his way." "Thank you!" "No problem, see you later."

~~

So there you are all dressed up waiting in the middle of your apartment to see Minho arrive in front of your house. You are stressing, they helped you so much with everything, but with everything that happened in their life and yours, it got harder and harder to see them and it resulted that you did not see them since a year and a half.

Of course you saw them in their new comeback, don't call me or in their interviews and in their lives, but it is still different form seeing them directly. Overall, you are excited to see them. At you think about that, a grey car made his way in the parking of your house. 

You locked the door of your house before going outside and join Minho in his car. "Hey!"
His big smile warm your heart. It so good to see people that you feel comfortable around them. He opened his arms and hugged you.
You really liked his attention and then he drove both of you to the place the other boys were.

You had a feeling it was at the grave, of
course, it make sense, but it is hard for you to go there. Hopefully, you will not enter this whole nightmare alone. You got welcomed by a hug from everyone and the tension in the air was not the most pleasant. Everyone was remembering the wonderful moment spent with Jonghyun.

~~~

He just came back from work and for the first time in the month, your best friend made time for you.

"JONGHYUN!!!" You jumped in his arms and hugged him. You missed him so much. "How was your day?" You start telling him every details of your day. Between laughs and talks Jonghyun and you arrive to the edge of  the sea.

At his turn, he told you about his day. It was your routine, telling each other everything. You could not imagine a life without him.

~~~

But now... you now how it feel to live without him and honestly it hurt way more than what you thought. Next to Taemin and Onew, you walked over Jonghyun's tomb stone. We can see the flowers that you putted next to it last week.

The boys start joking around and you just kept looking at the tomb stone. Does he know how much everyone is missing him? You just hope he is happier. He deserve it, so much. You kneeled down and kissed your fingers before putting them on the top of the tomb stone. The boys saw you and repeat your movement.

Now you know, every time you feel confident or you wake up and know it will be a good day it is because he is near you, forever in your heart.

~ They are countless reasons of why I need you ~

Hi guys!!

I know this is not the same kind of story that I usually write and that is a bit, sad. But I felt a need to honour Jonghyun on the account.

He was so precious and he really didn't deserved all the horrible hate he received. He was a real angel and we fail to protect him.

Like said in the story, I just wish he is happier where he is now, because he made us really happy so I think it is his turn now. Heaven gain an angel... must he Rest In Peace.

Also, I know it is maybe a taboo subject, but suicide is not a solution, if you need help there is a lot of organizations in place to help you or someone you know. This can be hard to talk to a stranger so if you fell comfortable you can talk about it with a friend or just someone you trust. I know you are loved and if you need to talk or anything you can always come to me! 

Mental health is important and we should not be scared to talk about it.

（╹◡╹）♡

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