Broken Youth

Chapter 46

Chapter 46

••Megan••

I smiled as Luke turned up the song; 'Guts' by All Time Low now blasting through the speakers. She'd heard the song too many times to count and several hindered of those times she'd heard it with Luke himself.

"This song reminds me of the first girl I ever loved and lied to." Luke indicated left as he pulled onto the main road going North to Scotland.

I looked out the window. "Who was it?"

"Renée." My heart beat a little faster as I longed to know more.

"Why are you talking in past tense then? Are you not in love with her now? Did you ever fall out of love?" I watched as Luke's hands clenched the steering wheel. I couldn't look at him; this was the first time we were conversing deeply with one another since the last time I slept with him.

"I still love her. And I don't think I ever fell out of love, it was just buried deep inside us both and when you came along, I was able to forget her and move on slightly. Only to be pulled right back when I left you all that year. I found her. And I fell in love with her all over again." His voice was hoarse as I listened, rolling down the window so that my hand could tap the roof of the car, my face relaxing as the freezing air hit me.

"You said you lied to her? What about that was so... Special? Everyone lies to one another all the time. So what was special about this time?" I dared to glance at Luke, seeing a sad smile appear on his face as his eyes watered slightly. I placed my hand on his. He flinched at the sudden contact.

"I lied to her about what I was." I nodded, realising what it was. "And I never really lied to anyone back then, especially not to girls. I was to scared they'd find out and run away and I'd never get one for my own." He chuckled.

"Luke Hemmings scared of never having a girlfriend?" I taunted. "That's news." I teased as he flipped me off. I moved my hand back to my lap, rolling up the window to half way.

"I used to be so shy and conservative and protected. I used to give a shit about people I didn't know and actually care about them and how they felt." I raised my eyebrows. I was shocked. He had once been a Luke I need in my life; someone so sure of themselves that they didn't show it at all, they just got on with life and actually cared about those around them. That seemly had changed. Luke, now, was a complete asshole, and an attractive one at that, who likes to show off and shove is confidence in other peoples faces but deep inside so able to feel, so heart-felt and just beautiful that he could become weak. Even for one the most powerful vampires to exist.

"What happened to that slightly more, immediately more attractive Luke, then?" I asked as he laughed, shaking his head.

"He was buried deep, deep inside of me." He paused, swallowing his tears. "When Renée left me, with two other people that I gave my heart to, I changed. Much like Calum did when Maddy left him. I had become so confident being with her that when she left me, I was so angry and upset that all I became was confident and then I decided I could flaunt it to seem as though I was in much less pain than everyone else..." Luke struggled to finish.

"Despite being in more pain than everyone else around you." He nodded.

"Exactly."

"I'm guessing Calum taught you that strategy to life? With his coffee and sugar ordeal?" Luke span his head to face me, tears now streaming down his face as his eyes widened. I smiled, putting my hand back on his.

"I read Jack's diary." Luke sat back in his seat, sniffling slightly. "The one he gave to Jess to give to Lauren. When I was clearing out her room I found it and read it. I've decided that I now know more about Maddy and Calum than I do about my own boyfriend and best friend combined."