Broken Youth

Chapter 32

~ Chapter Thirty-Two ~

••Megan••

Jess was amazing. At every event, every gathering, every beer night with the lads, every cosy catch up evening with the girls or even just a family dinner, she managed to capture the moment. She loved art. (I mean, who didn't know that). Her eyes saw things in a different light, things that we didn't see, her fingers always ready to re-position something and draw it, or grab Anne's Canon and shoot a few photos of the way leaves were laying that morning, she observed colour and pattern in a way I'd just take for granted, she'd have a small notebook and biro set in her bag at all times, ready to scribble down small, messy drawings or to jot down notes on how to improve her most recent canvas painting. But her specialty, other than all kinds of paint, was photography. Jess had five cameras. No-one was aloud to touch them; well, apart from the Polaroid. She had a Nikon- Kate's old one, a Canon, her grandmas old Sony, Niall's graduation present- a new Nikon, it was small and cute; for close ups, and of course her beloved Polaroid. And it was on those 5 cameras that our lives were documented. It wasn't invasive, nor was it tacky and cheap, but it was nice. It was a beautiful way of reminding ourselves in our elder years, that we did have a good time. And that we did enjoy life as it was, that we took nothing for granted and lived in the moment.

I knew that the vampires of our family (so everyone other than me and Jade) had been 15-17 for over 3 decades, but it was time for them to grow up; they'd come of age. It was a hard thing for me to get my head round, as I was only human, but basically a vampire grew up to the age of 15 and then had to learn everything they could over a period of time (usually several decades) before continuing to grow up. It was ingenious. They had to learn all they could in those years as a youth, they had to live life and enjoy themselves, enjoy being who they were and love what they did before getting old and boring. I loved it. It was almost as if they, whoever 'they' is, knew that you have the most fun as a young adult- a teenager. And so vampires had the luxury of living 3 decades of being a teenager and then they could grow up and get a job and get married and all that shit.

The photos Jess took were proof. Proof that they'd all loved everything, that they hadn't grown up and only now they were, knowing more about the world than most aged professors lying in their beds. It was proof that they'd loved each other and every moment they'd spent with one another. She'd made sure the photos she took were special and something they'd love as they got older. She didn't just take a photo of me and Mali cooking for the sake of it and we were both laughing and standing in an artistic way, but so that Mali could be old in her bed, wrinkly and forgetful, having been alive for hundreds of years, and see that she was once young. And once loved getting up to face the day, cooking with her friends, laughing about stupid things and making fun of her ex. Jess knew that. Not because that's what she wanted (although it was, of course) but because she could see how much Mali loved those moments- she could see how everyone loved those moments. She knew when to take the photos because she knew when that person loved that moment. That was her power. And I guess that's why she's so amazing at art; she sees things we don't.

I sighed.

Jess had made many photo albums and Polaroid folders in her time, but recently she'd made many more than usual. I flicked through the album of the summer, the Canon and Nikon photos placed so beautifully on the collage and random drawings of summery things, my heart warming as I got to a photo of me and Jess. We were clearly on the beach, our hair blowing wildly behind us, our faces turned to each other, a grin as wide as the ocean across our faces, eyes brighter than the sun in the background, our hands linked. I could see a blurred Niall in the back, his phone in hand, clearly taking a photo. I love the photo so much. We nearly always made fun of each other or teased one another, arguing about boys and stupid things like which late night TV programme we're gonna watch, her calling me slimy or me yelling at her for putting my soap in the wrong part of the sink, never really saying 'I love you, laters' when we walk out the house like Lauren and Mals do or texting to double check we are okay, unlike me and Mike. But we knew that ultimately there was nothing either of us could do to make each other hate the other.